The Ten Commandments of Mary Kay

A satirical set of commandments for those in Mary Kay.

The 10 Commandments of Mary Kay, authored by InTimeGetWise:

I. Thou shalt honor Mary Kay Ash and her company Mary Kay Cosmetics with all your heart, spirit, and bank account.

II. Thou shalt take a pilgrimage each summer to Dallas, Texas. Thou shalt wear wool, nylons, two pounds of costume jewelry and a quarter pound of cosmetics, perfume, lotion and hairspray to show your commitment.

III. Thou shalt not apply any other brand of cosmetics or skin care to your body; nor shall you give any gift to friends or family that is not Mary Kay product.

IV. Thou shalt remember your unit meeting and honor that time with your sisters in Mary Kay. Thou shalt bring a guest, be excited, come early, and stay late. Not birth or death, sickness or injury should keep you from your meeting.

V. Thou shalt honor your director and national as if they are Mary Kay herself by paying to be in their presence. Thou shalt not be worthy of their time unless thou art a star consultant.

VI. Thou shalt go out and bring new converts into the fold with qualifying orders of $600.00 or more.

VII. Thou shalt not allow your spouse to interfere with your commitment to Mary Kay. Thou shalt keep your priorities in order of Mary Kay, self, then everything else.

VIII. Thou shalt not steal customers or recruits from sister consultants. Thou shalt steal credit card and social security numbers from family if needed to move up the ladder of success.

IX. Thou shalt not speak negative words about Mary Kay Ash, Mary Kay Cosmetics, anyone or anything involved in the company in the past present or future.

X. Thou shalt covet your director’s car, your nsd’s paycheck and anything else that will cause you to become more materialistic and order more product.