Relationships

Another Mary Kay Husband’s Plight

I am the soon to be ex-husband of a beautiful senior sales director. Her Mary Kay career was to be the primary support for our family. Believing this, I quit my job to work part time and raise our daughter.

Mary Kay soon consumed her life and there was no time to spend either with me or our daughter. Soon the money started to run short month after month and we soon had to make a$680 a MONTH PAYMENT ON A CADILLAC WE DIDN’T NEED. She continued to try and recruit and promised women a “free car”.

Soon I was to blame for her failures and our marriage quickly deteriorated. Working 65-70 hours per week for an after expenses income of about $10,000 per year just didn’t make much sense to me. Her relationship with our 2yr old daughter is not much better. Because of her schedule, when she does find a few minutes to spend with our daughter she is miserable for her. I wish I had seen the truth in this “business” long ago.

10 COMMENTS

  1. I wish the same too, I got into it to help my mom but it was a total disaster, the more that gets me upset is that the use the name of God in vain, it hurts me.

  2. I am going through something similar. I have no idea how much debt we are in since I have been maneuvered out of the finances.

  3. Oh Lord. Better find out TODAY…After I left the business I had opportunity to contact and be contacted by over 30 former Directors. The AVERAGE personal Mary Kay credit card debt was 23,000.00 plus, on multiple cards. Some were in the 30K range as well. NO ONE was “better off” than before they joined the pink bubble!

  4. I have little knowledge of the open credit cards. However, creditors are calling daily. I’m answering the calls to see who is willing to talk about the full amount owed. I have learned we have credit cards I was unaware of, but the companies are not yet desperate enough for back payments to share debt information. I’ve sent off for a credit report with the plan of learning more. Trying not to panic!

  5. BTW: my wife was a freshly minted SD weeks before this year’s Dallas shindig. I was concerned over the creditor calls, and attempting to work through the issue without creating a nasty fight. I decided to become more proactive after reading the blog which detailed how much a consultant pays to earn recognition in queen’s court. Took a look at my wife’s sashes, and became ill as I read the labels. Can’t believe I allowed our life be encompassed by the pink bubble. My wife is smart, and I believed she’d see MK for what it is. I knew if I pushed her to quit then I’d be resented. This became clear when I asked about profits and losses. So I made a foolish decision to keep quiet. Wish I had found Pink Truth sooner. This site provides a service MK fails to present for their consultants and families: A true price tag on the awards and advancements. Rambling over. Time to get to work with patience, love, and compassion.

    • Loosing_Battle, profit and loss is something any business owner should have a handle on once they have been in business for more than about three months. By month 6 they should DEFINITELY have run a P&L and know if they are making or losing money looking at income vs. expenses. Unfortunately, although Mary Kay is positioned as a “small business,” the consultants/directors are NOT encouraged to run financial statements such as a P&L and are honestly not encouraged to really keep track of expenses at all. Your wife may not even know whether or not she is turning a gross or net profit. She may not even know how much is on the cards! Pulling a credit history is a good idea. I don’t know if you used just your name and SSN, or both of your names/SSNs, but be aware – in some of these situations I have seen “yours, mine and ours” cards – people will pull them in their spouse’s name, then jointly, then just in their own name. Until they can’t get any more credit. Unfortunately, I think you have an ugly confrontation coming, and I feel for you…I hope you keep coming back to this great site for advice and support. Big hugs.

      • P.S. – It is not about your wife being smart. These people are experts at preying upon people’s weaknesses. Any insecurity or “gap” she had in her life – her recruiter was able to hone in on that and exploit it. Your wife is caught up in something now that probably seems bigger than she is. There is still a way out, but it will involve her sending back her inventory, the car, etc. It may take her awhile to get there.

        • Michelle, I suspect something of the kind concerning the P&L early on. I ask questions, sometimes uncomfortable questions. Answers came in generalizations which are rather unsatisfying. I backed away when receiving what I now know are scripted responses about support and trust. I allowed myself to be manipulated to save the peace. I suspect you can believe that rationalization. Still disgusted in my actions all the same. As for the credit report, I am having it run exactly as you recommended. Won’t make any decisions or predictions until I see the documents. Will for a plan once info is in hand.

          Oh my do I know how they exploited her. We were going through a rough pregnancy, and that fear was used against her. Shameless! I’ve a S-I-L who has engaged in every MLM you can name, and leaving within three months. I expected to see the same with MK. Never been more wrong!

          I now feel as though I shanghaied the post the plight in the post that started this comment thread.

          Thank you for your advice and support.

  6. Let me first say that your wife is DEFINITELY not the only Director or Consultant that “made up the difference” for a trophy. I’ve heard Directors talk about “shifting cards”, meaning they pay one off to put it onto another with a lower rate–never paying anything down at all. I’m mature enough to realize it isn’t Mary Kay corporate’s fault that people choose to do such things, and it’s sad, really. The piece that bothered me was all the advice that’s given by Nationals, even, to do things like that when all it really ever does is weaken a Director or Consultant. Like my husband and I said over & over in the years leading up to my eventual resignation, “You can’t build something out of a house of cards.”

    If it helps, know that your wife isn’t the only one that was probably advised to do the things she’s done. It is tough to hear advice that doesn’t sound like the right thing to do, but, with a “successful” NSD or Director telling you to do it?

    I’m glad I resigned voluntarily, sent my Cadillac back voluntarily, and am where I am now. Things will turn around!

  7. “consultants/directors are NOT encouraged to run financial statements such as a P&L and are honestly not encouraged to really keep track of expenses at all.”

    No one in MK-land talks about expenses and, if they do, expenses are obliquely mentioned as “good” because of tax write-offs.

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