Why Do We Stay in Mary Kay?
Written by sadnpink
After my stint in Mary Kay and two other MLMs, I have come to the conclusion that many people stay because of two factors: peer pressure and guilt.
We come into this new business opportunity all excited about a new venture with limitless possibilities. This new endeavor will give us a chance to stay at home and have more family time. Plus, wewill be helping others to develop a business of their own. It gives us a good feeling that we are doing something positive with our time and energy.
Our uplines are there to help us and the company seems rock solid, so we believe we have made a wise investment for the future. We are welcomed so sincerely, and we start making friends with others who have the same dream and goal.
However, as we get down the road, whether we are a consultant or a director, we start to encounter some bumps in the road. We had been warned by our upline that this might happen and not to be discouraged. After all, we are told that God would never lead us into this opportunity unless He planned to use us. As a result, we keep plugging along even though the money is not coming in the way we had been told it would. After all, everyone else around us appears to be happy and prosperous. Little do we know (because no one is allowed to talk about it…that would be negative) that others are running into the same problems.
By attending the countless meetings, conferences and national conventions, we continue the indoctrination process. We see and hear so many heart wrenching stories about how women overcame terrible circumstances to reach the top, so we tell ourselves that if they can do it we can too. In addition, there is abundant recognition at each of these events and when our name is called to stand or receive our $2.50 bracelet for spending over $2400 of our hard earned dollars, we feel good inside as we hear the applause from our peers.
As doubts continue to mount in relation to the indebtedness and lack of success we are meeting, we call our upline as we have been encouraged to do. We express these concerns and are told to just keep working because it will turn around. After all, Mary Kay (or…you fill in the MLM name), is a numbers game. You just have to keep meeting new people all the time.
Since the person above us has been successful, we believe she knows what she is talking about. Therefore, we dismiss our concerns and keep trying to be a winner not a whiner. On unit or area conference calls we hear the same message and are asked to be a “team” player. If we let the team down, our unit or area will pay a heavy price. But what about us? Our credit cards are getting loaded, we have no family time, and we haven’t made any serious money yet!
The peer pressure is there to conform and the guilt keeps us locked into a scam that parades itself as a legitimate business opportunity. We don’t want to leave in some cases because we have led others into this company. What would they think? How can we abandon them? We also don’t want to let others down when we promised that we would be a leader. Haven’t we been told that the only losers are the ones that quit?
Mary Kay and MLMs in general have been likened to cults and other mind bending groups because they work on the basis of peer pressure and guilt. We are constantly being told at events what books to read, CD’s to listen to and scripts to follow. We are also told who to hang around with. If anyone is negative or if they have left the group, we are not to spend time with them. I have witnessed this first hand since I left. I have had little contact with anyone whom I had thought was a friend. No one called me, wrote to me or responded after I sent them a note.
Many of us stay because we think, “Where else can I go? What other skills do I have to offer?” We have so believed the press that we don’t think for ourselves any longer.
Well, I have a suggestion. It is time to declare our independence from guilt trips and from peer pressure. We need to take back faith in our abilities and our own good judgment. If our bank account is in the red, we do not need an accountant to tell us it is time to close up shop and move on. We need to make an executive decision to face reality and quit worrying about what other people think or will say. So what!!!!???
They do not pay our bills, care for our family, or live where we live.
When I made my decision to leave, there were those who tried to convince me to stay and those who made me feel like I was letting others down. However, I knew it was the right move. I had been allowing my life to be controlled by what others thought and my own need for recognition. Since that time, I have come to know the real joy in being my own person again. Now it’s your turn. What is holding you back? Guilt? Peer pressure? Take your life back and with it your money as well. There is no pot at the end of an MLM.
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Tags: mary kay guilt, peer pressure, upline
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Comments (8)
Freefrmpink
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This article is right on! Out of the 5 Mlm’s I’ve been involved with, I believe Mary Kay has perfected the manipulation & deception to a T. Everything is all good & you are prepared when its not through the indoctrination process. Directors are loyalist. Even if the ship is sinking, the life preserver becomes a negative. So we stay on board month after month, year after year. Sinking into more debt and desparity. You tell yourself, jumping ship means being a quitter. You say I’m a winner because quitters never win & winners never quit. I’ve got news for you, the only one winning in this is the MK corpse & a small number of NSDs. Some have less than 5 directors in their area. Pink Truth is handing you an opportunity to re-evaluate the sinking ship. I regret so many wasted years. But so blessed that I finally accepted the truth.
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Lazy Gardens
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We need to make an executive decision to face reality and quit worrying about what other people think or will say.
Yes! Make a decision based on business principles, not emotional blackmail and peer pressure tactics.
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montanafan
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Having not ever been in MK…..Does your upline actualy tell you that the money is in recruiting? I have a friend who is tring to get me to join on this $75 start up deal, but when I say I think MK is a MLM she says you dont have to recruit. Says you can just sell. But how much make-up does one person need to buy!!!! I just dought you make much $$ on selling make-up…?
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MLM Radar Detector
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How much inventory does and IBC have to buy? “A full wagon.” That amounts to anywhere from $600 to $3000, then as soon as MK changes the packaging (again) it’s all obsolete and nearly unsaleable.
But you’re probably more interested in how much you can expect to sell. After all, if you can move 2/3 of that inventory, you’re on your way.
In the United States, Mary Kay is not required to release consultant earnings information. Canada is different. Here’s the Mary Kay 2010 Canadian Earnings Representation Disclosure: http://www.marykay.ca/ContentPage.aspx?FileName=/home/earnings-representation.html
“In 2010, there were over 29,573 members of the independent sales force of Mary Kay Cosmetics Ltd. in Canada. Of the 3,836 who were in the independent sales force for at least one year and who earned commissions, 47.7% earned commissions in excess of $100. Of the 532 of those who were Mary Kay Independent Sales Directors, the top 50% earned commissions during the year of $17,649 to in excess of $100,000. Of the 24 of those who were Mary Kay Independent National Sales Directors, 50% earned commissions during the year in excess of $100,000.”
Do the math, and remember that “commissions” is BEFORE your expenses, not after.
In 2010, 87% of the Canadian Mary Kay sales force were either with the company for less than a year, or didn’t earn commissions, or both. The number of ladies who quit – EVERY YEAR – after only a few months of frustration is huge.
Only 2006 (less than 7%) of the Canadian Mary Kay sales force were both with the company for a full year and earned commissions, but their commissions on sales from those “full store” inventory purchases BEFORE DEDUCTING EXPENSES were less than $100 each.
Only 1830 (about 6%) of Canadian Mary Kay sales force were with the company for a full year and received more than $100 in commissions.
Of the 532 Canadian Mary Kay Sales Directors (only 1.8% of the total sales force), half of them received less than $17649 in commissions, again BEFORE expenses.
Clearly, sales commissions don’t amount to a hill of beans for Mary Kay consultants. The ONLY way to make any money in this company is to recruit, to get your recruits to recruit, and get all of them to order a “full wagon” of inventory from which they ALSO will earn little or nothing in sales commissions. But hey, they can recruit too….
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MLM Radar Detector
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Putting it another way, it’s easier to pass the CPA exam, the bar exam, or medical board exams than it is to make any money as a Mary Kay consultant.
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feelingbetrayed
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Oh but wait!……”What if I told you that you couldn’t fail?!!! We aren’t talking about rocket science ladies!”. I heard that EVERY Tuesday night at our ‘success event’. What a HUGE lie! Another one was “we have more women making 50k, 75k, 100k, and above than any other company in the US.” I would love to see some honest stats on that one as well.
Its a lie….all of it. And once you realize that and begin to ask questions you become the ‘blacksheep’ and negative. And so no one calls anymore after that. Its not because we are negative…we speak the truth. And the truth hurts. If they began to listen to the truth then it would be very detrimental to their ‘business’. And they cant face that so I guess they think it is better to turn the cheek. I will give credit to MK for creating the perfect cult, brainwashing, pseudo positive hoax. They have a quote from Mary Kay Ash herself, for every single issue and circumstance that arises. And if Mary Kay Ash can do it, so can you!(I hope to could here the enormous sarcasm in those sentences). If only they would take some of that energy repeating those lies and direct it towards coming forward and rebuilding broken friendships we would be making progress in the right direction.
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MLM Radar Detector
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“We aren’t talking about rocket science ladies!”
No, you’re not. Even rocket science is easier than making a profit selling Mary Kay.
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Lazy Gardens
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”What if I told you that you couldn’t fail?!!! We aren’t talking about rocket science ladies!”.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zVeFkakURXM
When things don’t go as expected, rocket scientists analyze the failure, discuss what didn’t work right, fix the problem and try again.
They don’t call each other “negative Nellie” for pointing out that the rocket seemed to have exploded, and they don’t say the launch team wasn’t thinking positive-enough thoughts.
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