Will You Please Open Your Eyes?

Written by Raisinberry

Heartbreak is the only word that comes to mind, as we who have depinked, watch the parade of our friends going over the cliff, pursuing the MK “dream”.

I still deeply care for my Senior, my offspring, my fellow Directors and Unit members. The Jury is still out on my National. I still believe that while being in the fog, she is well aware of the financial wreckage of all of her current and past downline, and it is hard to believe that “denial” is a big enough word to cover it.

We remember what it was to be fogged. PinkTruth was the demon site. Women who were lazy, negative, hostile, ignorant, probably “c” personalities that always gave us the most trouble ‘cause they just never were satisfied with our answers.

Good riddance.

But one day, we read some more. We came back. We started seeing scenarios that we understood all too well. The beginning of the end had commenced.

Today, far from the hoopla and hype, we can clearly evaluate what happened. We are watching our friends who are too afraid to look long and hard at this so called opportunity, make stupid decision after stupid decision because they still “bee-lieve”. We just can’t reach them. They won’t let us.

My Senior is now paying for her Cadillac. She has motivated my friend who stayed in, to become one of the “big girls”. My friend thinks she owes me “success” because I believed in her for all those years. She had been told I went “negative”. My cautionary tale fell on deaf ears. She is going to be a top Director.

She is now $9,000 more dollars in debt in the last few months just from her wholesale purchases… not to mention Seminar, and other events which likely went on a credit card too. So a woman who looks sharp and is willing, and wants to matter and be accepted and important, is slowly going into financial ruin, just to wear “big girl panties”. I can not reach her. I know my National and SSD see exactly what my friend’s limitations are, and happily take the wholesale from her anyway. I wonder how they think she will ever catch up from 10K last year and 9K this year so far?  She hasn’t a chance in hell to move $38,000.00 worth of retail product, and nobody seems to want to face this level of opportunism. Especially in light of new color coming out. She’s screwed.

When we talk about rationalizations and denial, we aren’t kidding.


  1. Iescaped

    Excellent article Raisinberry!

    I can only speak for myself, but I am sure that there are others who feel/felt the same.

    When I was in MK and decided to go for Directorship I knew that I wanted to be a SD that was different.

    I had high hopes and expectations for myself. I visualized being able to REALLY teach selling vs stalking. I visualized giving real prizes for consultant re-orders, like products they could use as testers at their appointments not silly, cheap, tacky jewelry. I also felt that I was better equipped then most of the others in DIQ since my Director was a National and she only lived about 5 minutes from me!!

    As I built my team to 10 to enter DIQ I visualized a lot of things. I love to daydream and my SD/NSD capitalized on that.

    But during DIQ, all of my dreams met up with the reality of life as a Mary Kay SD. It didn’t take long for me to see that the “math” never completely worked out. SD/NSD would sit down with me and show me how the “successful SDs make over $10,000 each month!! At a first glance, it seemed plausible. But looking closely the were always BS. The breakdown always included anywhere from $2000-$4000 in profit from sales! Heck, I wasn’t selling ANYTHING!! I was a recruiting machine just trying to hit my monthly MINIMUM!!!

    I suppose I would have stayed in the Pink Fog longer had I not had the ability to remember things as well as I do. As a DIQ, we were allowed to attend the monthly SD meetings. This meeting consisted of SDs from two Areas and 2 NSDs!! At my very first Director meeting I was expecting to be blown away. And I was, but probably not in the way my SD/NSD was hoping for.

    Not one SD from my Area was in the top 10 of anything (team building or sales, err ordering). What??? The numbers to make it to the top 10 were not that high! Why wasn’t any of the “successful SDs” from my Area there?? I was told how easy it would be to replace my NURSING INCOME in Mary Kay. If the 20+ other SDs in my Area weren’t able to do it, how was I supposed to??

    After 3 1/2 months of DIQ (with only 2 left to recruit) I walked away. Everything that I was told was BS. The contradictions were too hard for me to ignore. Even if I “could” be “successful” it would take years. And considering what I had spent so far, I could only cringe at what it would cost me. All the SDs and my NSD were living, breathing MK 24/7. There was no time for Faith or Family first.

    Maybe some in the Pink Fog are running on the hamster wheel so fast that they don’t really see the scam and pyramid. But the person not wanting you to get off or let the wheel slow down DOES!

    1. contemplating

      I could have written some parts of your response from my own experience. Such a well written response to a well written article!….sadly they are both true and resignate loudly.

  2. MLM Radar

    I still deeply care for my Senior… The Jury is still out on my National.


    I know my National and SSD see exactly what my friend’s limitations are, and happily take the wholesale from her anyway. I wonder how they think she will ever catch up from 10K last year and 9K this year so far?

    The jury just came back in. Both the National and the SSD stand convicted. Time to write them both off.

    1. contemplating

      I could NOT stand my NSD…so fake she could be smelled from me to her home in Nebraska. But not initially. I thought she was sincere at first…until I tried to hug her After some training “that was going to help me build my business.” But my SD; I absolutely adored her. I went through the same emotions of wanting to remain friends with her until I realized she had to be a little like other directors. She has to know the financial situation IBCs were facing; a situation she helped create with NO remorse or accountability. when I accepted this truth, it was easy to walk away, so yep….the jury is in. Nobody needs this kind of “positivity” in their life. I wish her well, but I also fear for the lives she may have and will destroy on her way to NSD.

  3. raisinberry

    It is still so hard to believe, that they KNOW what they’re doing, and they realize it is a scam.
    I still find myself saying, ” Nah! No way…they can’t REALLY know it is a scam…they HAVE to be in denial, brainwashed like I was…can they really not remember the 30-or 40 or 50 former Directors that used to be in the area? The 30-40-50 Unit members that were “stars” and are no more? Can you REALLY maintain that all those women are “lazy losers”…??

    And really, I can believe my SSD is just sold out brainwashed pink, but i KNOW my NSD knows exactly how money is made…and how much debt her downline was/is in…and how FEW women actually sell consistently in her whole area.

    It is just so hard to believe that this whole BS thing was INTENTIONAL…with no care for anyone’s finances or profitability.

    1. MLM Radar

      No one is so blind as the one who refuses to see.

      Yes, on those dark sleepless nights, when they see their own “business” is about to collapse, they know it’s because the women under them aren’t making any money. They just choose to not acknowledge the truth, again, when they reach for the phone.

    2. Iescaped

      I think all of us here can attest to the mixed emotions that swirl in our heads and hearts.

      On the one hand, I can remember times that SD/NSD was so very thoughtful, kind, caring and generous. Last winter during a windstorm we lost the roof to our barn. I had to get the horses off the property. And my dear hubby had gotten our truck stuck in the pasture so I couldn’t even haul them myself. SD/NSD called her family to my rescue. Her husband helped mine get the truck out while her son and soon-to-be DIL moved my horses to her farm. They stayed for a month while we did repairs.

      For the past year I have wondered if she did this out of the kindness of her heart or did she solve my problem so I could continue to recruit and make Director?

      I struggle with the thoughts that my friends in Mary Kay were only my friends because they wanted something from me or I was making them money.

      It is a difficult thing to try to figure out and come to terms with.

      1. contemplating

        It does not feel good to think that every action is out of manipulation rather than kindness, and yet it is something we all go through. I hope that’s who she was outside of MK.

  4. cindlylu

    I also had dreams of helping women once I heard how easy selling the products was. I had hoped to recruit women and build a great team. However early on I started to realize it wasn’t a dream but a pink pyramid nightmare. Based on what I am reading, there seem to be quite a few NSD’s that are narcisistic greedy predators. I knew at least 2 NSD’s and a few SD’s that were the epitome of greed. When reading the book “There’s Room At The Top”, all those NSD stories encouraged dreams of endless possibilities. Finally in MK there was a business started by a woman who cared about giving women the chance to succeed. A company that praised us, cared about us and allowed us flexibility. Sadly it was a fairy tale. It was the story of corruption, women using women and a company that does not care about women or its sales force. What a sad, manipulative and corrupt business model. Everything is done for profit and to set hundreds of women up just so a few NSD’s get to pretend they are special. The only thing special is their ability to lie and con hundreds of women.

      1. cindlylu

        No…I was not in that area. Maybe Dalene’s area is so similar to mine that most SD’s and NSD’s just use women to their detriment. I used to believe those stories in the book “There’s room at the top.” I used to believe in MK herself. Many years later, I now realize the whole thing was a predatory pink scam.

  5. BestDecision

    Have you seen the #myMklife hashtag they’ve created on Instagram? Just awful pictures. Gaudy jewelry, bad makeup, hair from the 1990s, and such fake success.

    Did any other past Directors on here realize what yesterday was and what we no longer have to deal with? Star quarter ending. So glad I didn’t have to constantly watch to see who kept their word, who missed coming to my Star Consultant awards, and who spent another fortune just for a cheap prize made in China. Glad to be out!

    1. I saw that on that one FB profile someone linked to on here for some SD or something like that in Chicago! As if I couldn’t already smell the fake oozing from the pictures, the turd on the top of this s*it sundae was the #myMKlife hastag

  6. contemplating

    Know what else I always wondered about MKC? Why would they limit all of the great MK marketing and “exciting” new information to in touch and only make it available to IBC, SD, and NSD? Because they are marketing to their end target, that’s why! In touch had some great advertising for sure.

  7. 4Freedom

    I too wonder about my former NSD and how she justifies herself. Her mom was an NSD who retired with $40K/mo income, so my NSD had seen the “dream” first hand. But she struggled: income looked good on paper as a top SD but then as an NSD very minimal. She won’t admit that the reason her mom did so well was because she was one of the 1st ones in. And things were different in the 60’s and 70’s: market wasn’t saturated, women were at home more, selling parties were new and fun. One of my NSDs favorite things to say when any SD admitted she was discouraged was ” so-and-so, you are better than this” – meaning you can achieve great things, you just have to believe and fix yourself. Shifting the problem onto us vs. the actual flawed MK business plan. I confronted her that I was her top SD for several years in a row and that I only netted $18K income per year after expenses on average for 6 years as a SD: how then could any of us be considered “successful”? She had nothing to say. Crickets on the phone. That’s when I told her I had already shipped back my inventory.

  8. Carried away

    I had a very brief 3 month experience in MK in 2011 and I have a story to tell. Even though my time was short the impact and lessons I learned from pink truth have been priceless. I broke even in MK only because of Tracy and real “I” stories of incredible women like Raisinberry, Gotheart and many others. I cannot thank you enough for saving me. The level of intelligence and honesty cannot ignored. You are MKs absolute worst nightmare!

  9. BestDecision

    If you are in the same car, with the same title, with the same net profit, and/or with the same unit/team/customers as you were 5 years ago, you need to wake up to reality. Yes, miracles do happen, but I’m not gambling my retirement, insurance, income, savings, and lifestyle on the hope of a miracle. The cruelest part of January was going to another Leadership Conference and feeling the letdown of not moving anywhere…again…and again…and again. Getting traction in Mary Kay is like getting traction in quicksand. It’s exhausting. People act like its the best thing in the world, that they’re living a glamorous life with no stress, but I’m here as living proof it isn’t so. The very definition of insanity is–what we were taught–doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

    The curtain has been pulled, ladies. 20/20 exposed how fruitless Directorship is, how out of date guest events (and those Director suits!) are, and how ridiculous the whole marketing plan is. Women are smart, savvy, and can see through the facade. Those that are signing up aren’t the sharpest nails in the box or they’d be wise enough to say “no”. Aren’t you supposed to be recruiting women just like yourself or better? Best wishes to you on that!

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