Written by Raisinberry
There is a very curious thing about being told by a Mary Kay NSD, not to let anyone “steal your dream”. When you dissect this directive, you begin to discover an elaborate straw man, used against you to misdirect objective thought.
The first time I heard it, I wondered how she knew what my so called dream was. The assumption was and is still today, that you want to be a Director. You want to make big money. You want prestige, recognition and to be somebody.
Soon we find ourselves buying into the assumption, and following along, even when we aren’t sure it is what we, ourselves want.
The second straw man being built is that someone is attempting to steal the dream from you. Even though no one is, the assumption is that a force is lurking, laying in wait, to crawl into your soul and snatch all emotional wherewithal to achieve your dream. This boogie man is stronger than you and your dream together. You must guard against anything that remotely smells like a dream stealer.That is how they keep women away from this website and questioning husbands.
It never dawns on them that a dream that any old boogie man can “steal” obviously means that it was not held tightly within our grasp. Secondly, if it can be stolen so easily, perhaps it was never “our” dream in the first place.
In my many years on the planet I have found that a real dream, born out of God given talents and abilities, survives the obstacles and negativity of others. How did they get us to believe that a chosen journey for life was so fragile a thing it couldn’t stand scrutiny or penetrating exposure?
Mary Kay knows that results are hard to come by, and facts are Mary Kay’s worst nightmare. Revealing the futility of a business that shifts and crumbles from a bad foundation means death to this pyramid… and millions of dollars in losses.
Your direct and truthful evaluation of your own results gets relabeled as a dream stealer activity, and the strawman argument is born. Did you set the goal to become a Director or was it thrust upon you? Did you set out to sit on the throne or was the entire event orchestrated to make you feel the want, in order to fill it? When you watched at Seminar as the Queen’s husband fawned over her and praised her, were your tears yanked from your heart in order to make you long to have the same validation from your own husband? This is the nature of manipulation. Heighten what is missing in your existence… where you fail, and what is your greatest need, and then answer it with the so called dream proposition.
With sites like Pink Truth, offering the “rest of the story”, NSDs are desperate to stop even the most casual reading of these stories. By characterizing us as dream stealers, they hope to support the notion that your dream is so fragile it can not stand an opposing view. The truth is, if the Mary Kay dream proposition fails you, it is not because a dream stealer took it, it is because it had no foundation, no place on which to build a permanent ladder to the goal. Because the bottom always falls out in mlm enterprises, your “dream” stays a “dream” and never becomes a reality. You are running a quest that eludes your grasp because little of what you have built, remains. If results reveal that you are spinning your wheels, and you verbalize that, the strawman argument will come out in full force, with your NSD reminding you that someone is trying to discourage you, and must be defeated.
But what if someone is trying to reach you?
Success all by itself will hold a dream steady. Like mice in Skinner’s box, if we reinforce the good results, we pursue the same stimulus and repeat the successful activity. As long as your dream is really what you want, and passion is placed behind that decision, no obstacle, real or straw can derail that pursuit. Certainly not some anonymous website.
Don’t let anyone steal your dream is code for not facing the reality of your business. You are losing money wholesale, you are losing friends and you are losing time, never evaluating if you wanted this in the first place, nor reevaluating if what you are doing is getting you where you want to go.
The persuasive trickster has replaced your dream with the one that gets her what she wants… and as long as you never see the strawman’s dangling limp body, you might never notice that he isn’t the only one on the hook.