Mary Kay Put a Wedge in My Marriage

Written by Nutmeg

Yes, MK did put a wedge in my marriage.  I was a stay-at-home mom with 2 children and was feeling a little neglected by my husband’s very busy work/travel schedule.  I decided to give MK a try to get me out of the house and make a little money.  My husband was a little worried that I got talked into over $3,500 (which I borrowed from our joint account) inventory, but was happy for me when I started making good sales and paying back the “loan” from our account.

I started Mary Kay on May 28 and my NSD was doing everything possible to talk me into going to seminar.  She tried to get me to book seminar and a plane ticket while on the phone with her, but I didn’t know her that well and wouldn’t go for it.  I talked it over with my husband and we decided it was stupid for me to spend more money when I hadn’t paid back the initial loan on my inventory yet.

A couple months after that, I wasn’t so lucky.  She talked me into going to a team leader retreat and wouldn’t get off the phone with me until I booked a plane ticket – she told me I didn’t need to ask my husband’s permission, did I?  After all, I had paid off my inventory, right?  I made my own money, right?

Needless to say, he was not happy.  She convinced me he wasn’t happy because he was jealous and afraid of my success.  As soon as I got back from that trip, I went into DIQ, and you all know what happens then.  I became crazy.  MK 24/7.  We couldn’t take our family vacation that we took every spring, my husband wasn’t happy about that.  Whenever he would come up with a valid point/question about this DIQ process or express his concerns about how much time I was away, I’d get the husband bashing from my NSD and my adopted SD.  I believed he was not supportive, jealous of my success and I stopped telling him things about my business.

My only saving grace during this time was even though I thought my husband was the enemy, I would not go into debt.  I would work like CRAZY to sell loads of product to make enough money to buy more to meet goals.  My husband stood by me but constantly was reminding me not to be stupid with my money and that MK’s business philosophy and rules just didn’t add up. (Telling an adult woman that she cannot have alcohol at any time during a business trip that she paid for out of her own pocket?????)

When his company started layoffs, I thought of what I would do if he lost his job.  I thought long and hard and realized I hated what I did.  I hated everything about MK.  But I couldn’t talk to anyone about that, especially my husband.  I couldn’t talk to MK people because that was negative and I couldn’t talk to anyone outside MK about that because I was so programmed that they were all negative and didn’t want me to succeed.  Then I found Pink Truth and knew I wasn’t alone.  The fog lifted and I did sit down with my husband and we discussed it.  I told him I decided it was best for me to step down as director and look for a part-time job instead.  He was thrilled.  Things became so much better.  We are all so much happier.

Thank God I saw the light and thank God for all of you wonderful women at PINK TRUTH!!


    1. PurpleH

      Oh yeah. A Mary Kay trip is all business and you should not be seen at the hotel bar, or at the liquor store because you are always representing the company. They actively pooh-pooh smokers and shame them too. As if anybody outside of MK cares what you do after the conference sessions end. It’s all another part of the cult-think mind control, with the bonus effect of not letting loosened inhibitions get people talking about the realities of their “businesses.”

        1. Simply Done

          Absolutely – any company that you work for, even ones that pay for your travel and benefits and income, should give their employees and shareholders and customers and anyone with skin the right to be themselves on any business trip. That’s why they were hired, employed and sent to represent their employer in meetings like a grown up, even rallies where everyone’s super charged and positive, say, like a political campaign, they don’t discourage you having cocktails or bars at events.

          So, goofy thing is, MK is a —– sorry, i’m drawing a blank on how to explain to grown ups what MK is to other businesses, but, it certainly isn’t an employer. It’s a paid membership, or storage units looking to fill themselves with makeup leftovers and using people’s credit cards and generosity and hardwork to move them back into the world of??? make-up, coasters, next years’ new classic? I don’t know, i’m flummexed. Never figured out why beautiful women with loving hearts and minds would, oh wait, now I get it… You guys are nice. Sorry, you had a crappy employment fake-out happen to you. God Bless, I sold my kit back 28 years ago and went on to be a real working mom – back when it was a very fun and fantastic journey and a juggle, but, my employer let me use the company apartment on Holiday weekends and my kid flew free to meet me on long Mom aways.

          I wish everyone on this planet well, but, in particularly the women who get punished for wanting to achieve something that wasn’t fairly explained to them – great good luck to you all.

    2. Char

      I was at an Amway/Quixtar meeting in 2000, and the speaker said women should wear skirts and not pants. WTF! I nearly stuck my foot out the aisle as he walked away from his “pulpit”.

          1. navyhawk

            I was the rebel consultant. I wore pants and was told off every blessed week for it. As for the alcohol. Same. I had a glass of wine at a meal. and was shamed like a i had a problem. I only started wearing a skirt when I was DIQ because the stupid jacket didn’t look good with my pants (well it didn’t look good anywhere.

      1. Char

        Wait, there’s more. I started asking too many logical questions. The “diamond thief” told my husband to tell “your wife” to stop being so negative. WTF, again. Needless to say, I’ve spent the next 18 years talking and posting about the scam of MLMing.

  1. Aubrey

    I have noticed this about MK’ers, that they presume to know more about your husband than you do. Saying things like “he wasn’t happy because he was jealous and afraid of my success” and “he’s not being supportive.” My MK saleswoman has tried repeatedly to get my husband to try the MK Men’s line, when I (and he) have told her repeatedly that he is not interested. She then tells me, “Well, you never know!” I’m like, no YOU never know because you don’t know my husband better than I do. MK husbands should start a rally to have MK shut down.

      1. SisterHavana

        Deanne Stidham (founder of Lularoe) has said that “if you get on your knees for your husband for five minutes a day, he won’t care how much Lularoe inventory you buy.” GROSS.

          1. Simply Done

            I just read the Bloomberg article about Lulularu(sp?) – and they are Mormons. Thank Orin Hatch for making MLM’s legal – considering what he’s attempting with Childrens Health Insurance (CHIp), I’m not sure he did it for the benefit of ‘families who stay together’ and Christian principles of Jo Smith.

            I just think that downlines and salvation come naturally to him. Thank You Orrin. Is that Mary Kay foundation you wear when smudging and dabbing your eyes as you cull any humanity out of ‘money making schemes’? – neat.

      2. Shay

        Haha! Now the roles are reversed. I know I like coming home to a clean house.😀 I will give the MR the S word for a clean house when I come home.

        If I’m being inappropriate just tell me. I won’t take it personal. I adore you. I’m sure you know that. I visit almost everyday.

  2. MKult trains victims to isolate themselves and other victims from family and pre-cult friends… they’re “negative”. Why? As this article points out: They are a voice of objective analysis and reason that are not under the influence of extreme social persuasion MKult relies upon to ensnare their victims.

  3. MichelleM

    A dozen years or so ago, all the designers had a “pink” season. I remember going into Macys and seeing a display of 1 shoe from every pink sandal that was being sold – I was so excited! Well, this season is another “pink” season – handbags, shoes etc. Holy cow, I just got the significance of that!! 🙂

  4. I read it somewhere, and maybe someone can point me to the source, that MKA herself said, paraphrased, “You can do MK with a husband, and you can do MK without a husband, but you can’t do MK against a husband.”

    Anyone know a source for this? Also, I’d love to know how that is to be interpreted by consultants…?

    1. BestDecision

      She did say that, but I can’t remember where we saw it. It meant to us that we had to have our husbands on board or we’d have a bigger battle to be successful.

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