Fun Tips for Enjoying Seminar

Written by The Scribbler

Listen; can you hear it? The pumping beat of a hot mix tape designed to motivate, energize, and get you hopping around on your high heels like a stork trying to do the Lindy Hop.

“Rock you Like A Hurricane?” Uh-uh…no WAY! That song was my prom theme – me being here must be a divine act! In fact, paying off the $1,000 + charges I’m going to accumulate from this event is going to TAKE a divine act. Excuse me, waiter? I’ll have what that director on the floor over there is having.

Seminar is on the horizon! Are you ready? Whatever your answer is, you aren’t TRULY ready until you take a gander at these handy Seminar tips courtesy of NSD Pamela Shaw. She’s absolutely got YOUR needs in mind, young padawan learners; so purge thyself of all uncleanliness and come sit at her feet! Hey, you in the back – remove your close-toed shoes; the place on which you stand is holy ground! Now let’s get it ON!

1. “Stay in company hotels. If the EVENT IS IN YOUR CITY, STILL stay in a Company hotel. Driving back and forth from your home keeps you ½ in the Conference and ½ in your home life and responsibility. There is NO WAY you can have an effective ‘thought shift’ or FULL Experience that way.”

You’re kidding, right? Let’s see here…choices, choices…

– Sleep under a foreign, crowded, and overpriced roof in a sagging hotel bed that everyone from the local Mafia boss to Cinnamon the stripper has done business in.

– Sleep under a familiar, cozy, and best of all, FREE roof in my own comfy bed, where – chances are – any business it has witnessed doesn’t fall under headings listed in the Dallas police blotter.

(Although my director said I needed to throw my husband a bone once in a while to make him LOVE my business…)

2. Attend ALL classes, ALL General Sessions, Individual Education Classes. ALL. You’d be hard pressed to find a Million $ Director or NSD who skipped—ever. Certainly not after she made the decision to grow and advance her organization.

I love how Pam whips out the guilt whammy right off of the bat; the tone reminds me of Ms. Almira Gulch from the “Wizard of Oz”:

“Tsk! Now Sally, you’d best be at every class at Seminar! I’ve never heard of ANY NSD who’s ever skipped – well, certainly not one who’s made the choice to grow her business! (clears throat, sniffles) Now get back outside and bang those erasers together or it’ll be the Dunce cap for you again tomorrow.”

Look, if I paid over $1,000 to get to Seminar, you can darn well bet I am going to spend that time as I please and you should, too! As my momma used to say, “Honey, if she ain’t payin’ your rent, she can howl all she wants – it don’t mean a thing to you.”

So, (ahem) is Pam Shaw paying YOUR way to Seminar? No? Then go see Dallas, for crying out loud! Six Flags is the bomb, the Dallas Museum of Art is relaxing, and come on, does Mary Kay really care whether or not you go to her museum? I guarantee your business and how you run it is the LAST thing on her mind right now!

Part two of this comment involves a bit of medical terminology, so if you were on target to become a medical professional before Mary Kay ripped that dream from your arms and replaced it with the Dream of NSD-dom, you’ll love this. Why, it might even inspire you to pursure that dream once again!

“Headache, tiredness, sore feet, interview, shopping, first time in a great city—never an excuse. If Mary Kay herself attended Seminar with Shingles, I can press through my personal discomfort.”

Okay, add this one to the “Now I Officially Know Too Much” file. Shingles is very contagious and can be passed to anyone who hasn’t had chickenpox, and the open sores one has with shingles makes passing it on pretty easy. NO event on the planet is worth killing yourself over.

Any company that insists that you attend one of their events while disregarding your personal condition and/or needs does NOT have your best interests in mind! For the sake of your roommates and the women who will be seated around you, if you are SICK, you have no business being at Seminar! Stay HOME and do it without a twinge of guilt!!

10 Comments

  1. ShatteredPinkCaddyDreams

    Not to mention the lack of quality food and drinks that have not been picked over. It’s a germaphobes nightmare, and the rest of us will cringe as well. You will need extra money to feed you so you will be full and there will be a line everywhere you go.

    Additionally, it’s hot! Really hot and wearing the same suit jacket in 90-100 degree weather leaves a bit of a musty smell in the area.

  2. BestDecision

    I hated every single Seminar I ever attended.

    Never came home feeling uplifted but rather scolded because I didn’t Gold Medal 17 times that year.
    Or that my unit size wasn’t high or increased enough.
    The heat.
    The smell of the restrooms, stagnant and hot from the crowds and hand driers.
    Watching over an hour of one Court to walk across the stage.
    Never really ever hearing solid examples of how the Queens did what they did.
    Stale food served assembly line.
    Cadillac Dining that wasn’t at all any different than regular other than the drapery and the Cadillac spinning around on a platform.
    Sean Key’s ego.
    Pins.
    More pins.
    Bar pins from 1988 still being showcased like they’re rockstars.
    Scratchy Director suits.
    Heels.
    Waiting for buses.
    100 degrees every day.
    Running to get enough seats for my unit or team in Hall A.
    Squeezing in to sit for hours in Director classes.

    Not one Seminar was ever worth what I paid to get there.

  3. Neverpink

    Did Mary Kay REALLY attend Scaminar with shingles?? If so, holy crap! Not only did she feel the need to scam people and brainwash them, but she also didn’t care enough about their health and safety to keep her contagious illness away from them!

    Mind blowing.

  4. Deflated Pink Bubble

    Best way to enjoy Seminar? On your very own couch in your very own living room binge watching Bravo! 🙂

    I had so many people trying to guilt me into going to Seminar every year. Never listened, never went, never regretted it!

  5. JanRD

    I’ve attended conventions and seminars paid for by my employer and earned credits toward maintaining professional credentials. I’ve also attended conventions as a franchise owner with no charge for meals and entertainment, and lodging/travel expensed to our business. I could wear what I wanted and didn’t have to room with multiple people. I have yet to decide what the benefits are of following a restrictive dress code in the heat of summer, staying four to a hotel room, and facing lines for the restroom and overpriced, mediocre food. Has anyone been to Seminar that can honestly say that the workshops and rah rah sessions increased her income, improved her skills, etc.? I didn’t think so.

  6. Char

    Rainy day here and watching the movie “Believe”. Amazon Prime Video has it available if anyone hasn’t seen it. There’s some classic seminar/rally scenes in it. Cringe

    The MLM Recovery Center patient at 00:23 was recruiting at a funeral while carrying the casket. The reddit post on the discussion board jarred my memory about the scene.

  7. EyesWideShutNoMore

    I’ve never been to Seminar, but the Canadian version is in Mississauga – it’s so expensive to come here from another province because we get ripped off for airfare. No Southwest here! I’m only about 2hrs away from Mississauga so it made getting out of going a bit of a challenge but I held strong lol.

    Did anyone go when it was in Montreal 4 years ago? The commonwealth games were on at the same time so the venue was moved to Quebec. I guess Corp figured most of the people that go are from there anyway, or at least the “big players” are so throw them a bone!

  8. Kinzie

    I’m pretty sure that even though Mary Kay showed up for a little while at seminar with shingles she went home that night to sleep in her own bed in her own mansion and came back for a while the next day. No way she stayed for the entire event under the same conditions. It’s not even the same thing. Besides, who knows how severe her outbreak was? I have had shingles three times, each with varying degrees of intensity. Fortunately Ive never been hospitalized but I know people who have. I can guarantee you that MK’s could not have been that severe. I know that they were using “Mary Kay with shingles’” as an example of pushing through your difficulties but seriously….she can’t expect people to do what she wouldn’t have been willing to do herself.

    1. MLM Radar

      Mary Kay Ash was PAID to appear at Seminar when she had shingles. The whole “she showed up even though she was sick” argument is nonsense.

      Every single person in the convention center paid to see her there. So yes, showing up when she had a rash (which was NOT contagious to most of the people present) was a good decision. Also, her rash was covered by her clothes, so chances of her exposing someone else who wasn’t already immune to chicken pox were pretty small. In the 1960s and 1970s most of the US population had chicken pox as a kid.

      The pressure and induced stress of Seminar might make people break out in shingles, if they’d had chicken pox in the past, but that’s another matter that has nothing to do with touching Mary Kay Ash’s hand.

      OTOH, using that MK story as an argument to make YOU show up at Seminar when you’re sick is just stupid. First, you’re NOT being paid to be there. You’re the one paying. Second, if I’m also paying to be there and I find out that my roommate/bedmate is bringing something contagious I’m going to be upset. Really upset. And things will go downhill from there, fast.

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