Mary Kay Gospel

This summer (when she was desperately trying to qualify for a Cadillac), Ali Zornes was waxing poetic on Instagram about how lucky she was to find Mary Kay. And all the way at the end, she says that the Mary Kay opportunity helps her “share the Gospel of Jesus.” Really? Pushing cosmetics and a non-existent business opportunity helps you share Jesus with people? Exactly how, may I ask?

13 Comments

  1. MLM Radar

    Interesting. But I can’t find the gospel verse where Jesus promises “free cars, prizes, trips, etc.”

    I had no trouble finding the gospel verses about “take up your cross and follow me” and giving up treasure on earth so you’d have treasure in heaven.

    Perhaps my King James translation is faulty? Curious, though, that my NIV matches King James. They don’t match the Mary Kay NSD version, whatever that is.

    1. NayMKWay

      MLM Radar, the passage you’re looking for isn’t in the Gospels, but in the Epistles. Look for II Prosperities chapter 6, starting at verse 12:

      “I count it all joy, hun brethren, that I have sacrificed my finances to my upline, for I have received the fullness of the joy of cruising in my pink vehicle of copay. And I encourage you all in the Faith of The Kay of Mary, that your lives may he filled with the overflowing joy of deception and manipulation. Even so, amen.”

      That may not be in your version.

      1. MLM Radar

        LOL. Obviously not an authorized translation.

        This must be one of those missing gnostic letters. How convenient of the NSDs to find it. I didn’t know pink cars existed back in year 33 CE.

  2. Neverpink

    I find it really gross that MK Huns (and many MLMers) push this sticky-sweet “prosperity gospel”. Be in our MLM! It’s your god-given calling!

    I’m not a Christian but this seems awfully fake to me. Are they using the guise of Christianity to lure in other Christians, because “oh they’re a good Christian, they’d never lie to me”? It’s so bizarre.

    Also, she proclaims that “what a mediocre life I would be living” if she didn’t take up MK. Really? If you’re so convinced that anything else is “not doing anything with your life”, someone’s got some serious blinders on! (Obviously that’s true, but I thought it needed to be said.)

    Scamming women isn’t “doing something” with your life, Ali.

    1. NayMKWay

      Quote:

      “…you hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of the bones of the dead and everything unclean. In the same way, on the outside you appear to people as righteous but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness.”

      – Jesus, as recorded in Matthew 23:27-28

      Religious hypocrisy is nothing new, and Jesus was no fan of it. The above reproach was directed at the elite religious leaders of the time, but if Jesus were to speak at Seminar, I’m pretty sure the message wouldn’t be much different.

      1. MLM Radar

        Another definitive passage is Matthew 7:21-23

        “Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven. Many will say to Me in that day, ‘Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, cast out demons in Your name, and done many wonders in Your name?’ And then I will declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness!’”

        She can “Give Jesus the glory” for that pink car all day long. But since making false promises and front loading inventory aren’t the will of God, her praise will only condemn her.

  3. PeachyNotPink

    …what a mediocre life I would be living.
    Huh, my mediocre life has landed me a career with life insurance benefits, PTO, matching 401(k), and healthcare. My mediocre life has also allowed me to purchase a vacation home at the beach where I spend my weekends enjoying myself. I don’t have to constantly be texting, calling, social media posting to keep my mediocre job and my mediocre vacation home. I just have to work 40 hours each week.

    This 18 y/o girl…
    Well, this 46 y/o woman would like to warn you that you really don’t know enough about life just yet, so please proceed with caution. You are very young, optimistic and malleable. That is not necessarily a bad thing, but without proper counsel it can potentially lead you into harm….such as becoming a MK IBC. I hope that whatever damage this does to your life, relationships, and finances can be repaired later on.

  4. enorth

    2 Timothy addresses spiritually-weak women who are easy prey for false teachers who capture their minds… “women led by various desires, unable to discern spiritual truth from error, hearing exactly what they want to hear, always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth, easily flattered, not wanting the truth but turning to myths…”

    Fertile MLM hunting-grounds.

  5. Lazy Gardens

    Well, maybe she should have a talk with Jesus about the whips and turning over tables … John 2:13-16 “And making a whip of cords, he drove them all out of the temple, with the sheep and oxen. And he poured out the coins of the money-changers and overturned their tables. And he told those who sold the pigeons, “Take these things away; do not make my Father’s house a house of trade.””

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