Don’t Let Them Steal Your Dream

Written by Raisinberry

There is a very curious thing about being told by a Mary Kay NSD, not to let anyone “steal your dream.” When you dissect this directive, you begin to discover an elaborate straw man, used against you to misdirect objective thought.

The first time I heard it, I wondered how she knew what my so called dream was. The assumption was and is still today, that you want to be a director. You want to make big money. You want prestige, recognition and to be somebody.

Soon we find ourselves buying into the assumption, and following along, even when we aren’t sure it is what we, ourselves want.

The second straw man being built is that someone is attempting to steal the dream from you. Even though no one is, the assumption is that a force is lurking, laying in wait, to crawl into your soul and snatch all emotional wherewithal to achieve your dream. This boogie man is stronger than you and your dream together. You must guard against anything that remotely smells like a dream stealer.That is how they keep women away from this website and questioning husbands.

It never dawns on them that a dream that any old boogie man can “steal” obviously means that it was not held tightly within our grasp. Secondly, if it can be stolen so easily, perhaps it was never “our” dream in the first place.

In my many years on the planet I have found that a real dream, born out of God given talents and abilities, survives the obstacles and negativity of others. How did they get us to believe that a chosen journey for life was so fragile a thing it couldn’t stand scrutiny or penetrating exposure?

Mary Kay knows that results are hard to come by, and facts are Mary Kay’s worst nightmare. Revealing the futility of a business that shifts and crumbles from a bad foundation means death to this pyramid… and millions of dollars in losses.

Your direct and truthful evaluation of your own results gets relabeled as a dream stealer activity, and the straw man argument is born. Did you set the goal to become a Director or was it thrust upon you? Did you set out to sit on the throne or was the entire event orchestrated to make you feel the want, in order to fill it? When you watched at Seminar as the Queen’s husband fawned over her and praised her, were your tears yanked from your heart in order to make you long to have the same validation from your own husband? This is the nature of manipulation. Heighten what is missing in your existence… where you fail, and what is your greatest need, and then answer it with the so called dream proposition.

With sites like Pink Truth, offering the “rest of the story,” NSDs are desperate to stop even the most casual reading of these stories. By characterizing us as dream stealers, they hope to support the notion that your dream is so fragile it can not stand an opposing view. The truth is, if the Mary Kay dream proposition fails you, it is not because a dream stealer took it, it is because it had no foundation, no place on which to build a permanent ladder to the goal. Because the bottom always falls out in MLM enterprises, your “dream” stays a “dream” and never becomes a reality. You are running a quest that eludes your grasp because little of what you have built, remains. If results reveal that you are spinning your wheels, and you verbalize that, the straw man argument will come out in full force, with your NSD reminding you that someone is trying to discourage you, and must be defeated.

But what if someone is trying to reach you?

Success all by itself will hold a dream steady. Like mice in Skinner’s box, if we reinforce the good results, we pursue the same stimulus and repeat the successful activity. As long as your dream is really what you want, and passion is placed behind that decision, no obstacle, real or straw can derail that pursuit. Certainly not some anonymous website.

Don’t let anyone steal your dream is code for not facing the reality of your business. You are losing money wholesale, you are losing friends and you are losing time, never evaluating if you wanted this in the first place, nor reevaluating if what you are doing is getting you where you want to go.

The persuasive trickster has replaced your dream with the one that gets her what she wants… and as long as you never see the straw man’s dangling limp body, you might never notice that he isn’t the only one on the hook.

7 Comments

  1. MLM Radar

    Looking back, the only time we ever got asked what our dreams were was in a question that got answered “That’s exactly why you need Mary Kay!”

    It was never my dream to be an overworked, underpaid, outside sales representative, who was expected to carry the blame for believing the lies from people who knew better. It was never my dream to represent a company that built its sales force by preying on the desperate, the naive, and the financially ignorant.

    It was never my dream to shame anyone who had the presence of mind to ask questions, tally up expenses, compare the expenses to revenues, and count hours invested (wasted), which is something REAL business owners do every month.

    And it was never my dream to do all of the above in the name of God. There’s a special place in hell waiting for people who prey on others in the name of God. My ultimate dream is to NOT find myself there.

  2. NayMKWay

    “Don’t let THEM steal your dream.”

    “THEY are jealous of your success.”

    “THEY want to discourage you and hold you back.”

    “WE are on your side.”

    “WE are your tribe.”

    “WE are only interested in your success.”

    “WE love you.”

    Such are the platitudes of nearly all MLM companies, including Mary Kay.

    It sounds like a cult, because that’s what it is. Cults exert control over their members by first isolating them, and that means creating an “us-versus-them” mindset.

    THE ENEMY isn’t some faceless “force” out there somewhere; it’s personal. For Mary Kay, it’s not Pink Truth the site; it’s those “wrinkled losers” who spew forth negativity. It’s not just any people; it’s your family. It’s your husband. It’s personal.

    That’s the true evil here. Mary Kay may say it’s God first, family second, career third, but the reality is quite the opposite. Are family demands getting in the way of directorship? Hire a nanny/maid. Is your husband expressing concern? Tell him to load the car and get out of your way; he’s just an obstacle.

    When anyone says to you “Don’t let THEM steal your dream,” they’re trying to sabotage your personal relationships, because that’s how they gain more control over your life. You have been warned.

  3. Cindylu

    A sad and pathetic dream. Standing in your home alone at a MK Open House and no one shows. Going to some fair and having women avoid the products like the plague. There are just so many times we can delude ourselves that the I stories make sense(they don’t), that the unit meetings are worth it (when my SD unnerved women I invited), that Seminar was real when meals weren’t included, we shared rooms with strangers and the women prancing across stage and wearing a sash seemed conflicted. I kept waiting to hear how exactly they sold all that product, were able to recruit and got those awards. In the end it all seemed strange and improbable. So happy to be away from that madness and financial pitfall. 🙁

    1. BestDecision

      Open Houses were the worst! So much time for so little results. One of my Consultants asked our Queen of Sales how many customers she had, and she wouldn’t tell her a number. I heard Directors backstage say they ordered dozens of boxes of product to finish Unit Clubs, and I saw Directors ordering Starter Kits for customers who would take up $600 worth of orders to pay for a qualified order under false pretenses.

      My own Director had rooms filled with products, and she could never tell me what her net profit was. It was always what her highest check was and that any corporate America job would pay less.

      Funny, now that I’m out now, they’re all stuck in the same place or worse. Not me!

      1. TRACY

        Another one of the many lies. People will tell you how successful open houses are and you need to stock up. And then you’ll have 3 people show up. The directors know that almost everyone has this result, but they push it anyway because it brings in big orders

      2. Char

        Got to hand it to Mary Kay for their clever albeit shady marketing method. Look at all those consultomers and directomers buying hundreds of product from the company. No wonder they are a billion dollar debt-free company. With such a huge “buying force”, of course they are.

  4. Not a Bot

    I don’t think most people’s dream is to be a pushy make-up saleslady for a company viewed by most as outdated or the annoying person who harasses family, friends, and acquaintances to buy over priced make-up and sign up to be a consultant. They push MK as the vehicle for the dream of many women have; work from home, earn good income, and have a great time doing it. Sadly it is smoke and mirrors and many people seem to have the complete opposite experience, they lose money and waste time, get isolated from real family and friends, and lose their MK ‘friends’ when the decide to stop.

    I was briefly part of another MLM. The ‘dream’ they push in front of your face is being rich, huge houses, recognition, freedom, and staying at home with family and of course they are the only vehicle for your dream. A regular J.O.B. is working for somebody else and will never provide it. I never jumped all in and even told them being super rich isn’t my dream. They then tried to say how I could help family and friends, etc. I am not a salesperson and I am not a good liar and I couldn’t tell people about a ‘wonderful opportunity’ if I didn’t believe it myself which I didn’t. I quit and I am glad I got out when I did.

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