Religious Abuse in Mary Kay

Once again I am using this forum in a very personal manner, in that I need to see this in black and white and learn if this strikes a chord in anyone else. I thought I was over the anger as I enter the last phase of my un-illustrious MK career. I read my dear friend Raisinberry’s post about the satanic influence of PT on the Mary Kay world and it all comes crashing down again.

We have alluded to the damage that can be done in Mary Kay, but I am not sure we have adequately addressed the religious abuse. It has been covered before, so if you are an old timer, I apologize for the rerun. If you are new, I hope this helps you in some small way. And before I get started, I want to thank Cougar, Raisinberry and Pink Fog for listening to me and loving me during multiple previous meltdowns.

I have always considered my religion and my beliefs to be intensely personal and private. I didn’t consider myself to be a “Christian” as so many do, in that I prayed to God and my prayers consisted of phrases like “God the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost.” Most self professed Christians I had been exposed to were intolerant and hypocritical “Jesus Freaks.” I was very comfortable with my choice of doctrines and beliefs. Someone asked me if I was a Christian once, and I remember replying, “Well, I am a major denomination, and last time I checked, that sufficed.” They assured me they would pray for me.

The God thing and Mary Kay…

I remember asking my recruiter many years ago, before I signed my agreement, if MK was some sort of religious cult. She laughed and said “NO!” I believed her.

Fast forward to my first Seminar. All the top directors used God as their business partners, God was blessing them and they thanked God and Mary Kay for the success they were enjoying. I dismissed them as misguided, but well intended, zealots. My business grows, I go up the career ladder as fast as my credit card levels and manipulative skills can allow me and soon I am in the 2% club and am a director. I feel as though I am in suspended animation for awhile. The longer I am in MK the more attuned I become to the religious inferences. And it is amazing. And really, really scary.

I had been invited to join a Bible Study and finally went. We prayed for red jackets, production and bar pins. I wasn’t aware we could do that. I had grown up believing “Thy will be done” and my wishes had never factored into that. I am looking around at these other women who seem to have something I am missing. They are enjoying more success with MK than I was, and I am thinking that I really missed the boat, or at least skipped some pretty spectacular catechism classes as a much younger person.

So I listen, and I buy the books and the CDs they listen to. I became a John Maxwell, Joel Osteen, Joyce Meyer, Beth Moore, Jack Canfield, Bruce Wilkinsen, etc. groupie. Everything I am hearing from top directors about God and Mary Kay, and hearing a nsd say that God holds MK in the palm of his hand resonates with me. I am not right with God and that is why I am not right with my business. Such a relief to figure this out, finally. Hundreds of dollars and sleepless nights finally over.

Or. Maybe. Not.

Meetings now include prayers, public and private. Interviews are prefaced with silent prayers for the right words. My business becomes my mission field. THIS is my purpose. It’s so not about make-up, it’s about bringing people to God. I had a problem with the materialism in my own zealot-like behavior and sought the wise counsel of a now nsd. I remember asking her what God had to do with a pink Cadillac and was told that it is an outward symbol that is attractive to someone, our lifestyle attracts people to MK, and that’s why is was so important for me to be in a Cadillac. Essentially, get them with the Cadillac and the bling and then bring them to God. Okay. I bought that.

And continued in my own little mission field. Without much success. I threw my heart over the bar, I believed God put sharp women in my path, I prayed before every interview, meeting, class and skin care class, that the right words would touch her heart and then I would give God the glory during my Seminar speech. It was all for God and His Glory. I was victorious, I was blessed, I was the daughter of the King and I would be rewarded.

Except that I had nothing really to show for it. I was not doing well. Every now and then I would recruit, but my unit wasn’t, so I wasn’t being the leader God wanted me to be. I learned that I needed to do all I could and then I was to stand on faith. I did and I did, and there was no blessing to show me I was on the path.

It was me. I heard over and over how women would die and would have to face God and Mary Kay. Sometimes, it was Mary Kay and God. And I knew I was such a shame-filled miserable failure that I would miss them both. I talked to a spiritual advisor… I told him that I had heard at a Bible study that frogs were falling from the sky in Hawaii, and that this had been foretold in the Bible and was the beginning of Revelations. (I had been unable to find the frog thing in my Bible, but by that time, I thought I had the wrong Bible.) He told me he hadn’t heard about the frog thing and he reminded me that Mary Kay was not a religion, and perhaps, another Bible study, not related to Mary Kay, might be in order. I asked him, based on my prior religious training, if I had been saved. He smiled, took my hand, and said, “We have that covered.” I left and cried in my car for 20 minutes.

So, after that, I buy more stuff to keep me on track… medals, slogans in my car, new books, more events, more prayers, more everything. Nothing is working. I am left, by myself, in my guilt and anguish and despair. There is a part of me that knows it’s me and I am on way to hell.

About this time I Google negative Mary Kay and I am sent to Mary Kay Sucks (now Pink Truth). I read this negative stuff about Mary Kay and meet some of the losers, whiners, and non-believers. And I can’t quit reading. I start questioning Mary Kay and since I have blended Mary Kay and God, I am, in fact, questioning God. Why is God punishing me? Why would He not allow me success in Mary Kay? What did I do wrong? How do I fix it? Can I fix it? Have I blown it already? Am I going to hell? I am going to hell for sure, now.

So, I start questioning Mary Kay… many many questions… I read Pink Truth/Mary Kay Sucks and need some direction… of course, when I talk about my discoveries on MKS/PT with my sister directors, I am urged to get away and not let that negativity into my heart or my head. I can’t stay away! I can’t stay away! I am learning “what not to do” so I keep reading… ARE YOU READING THAT NEGATIVE SITE????? NO! No, not me, not any more. Whoa… that was my bad, so sorry! What was I thinking? So glad to have learned what not to do, but, no siree, not going back there.

And there’s a link on my desktop. I am learning and listening to the posters, Shabby in Pink, Bananarama and I am obsessed. I go back and forth between my Unit Net site, InTouch and MKS/PT. The days are full.

Slowly, slowly, it occurs to me that MK is NOT God, and a new peace comes to me. I start really looking at what has been said and what has been done and what has been implied and I start to see the lie. I take the books off my shelf. I put them in the garage for the sale I always say I will have and never do… these “Godly” books and their messages are now contaminated.

I Google negative Joel Osteen and read that. I Google negative Joyce Meyer and read that. The Secret is introduced. I knew of prosperity and abundance thinking when it was Abraham Hicks. (for newbies, the info was channeled through 6 beings of Light, etc etc) New Age interacts with Prosperity Theology. MK aficionados insist it is from the Book of Abraham… in the Bible, you know???? Of course, I have the wrong Bible, again.

I know this is long. I also know It is the most painful passage for me out of MK. I can’t be the only one. Please. God is not MK. God does not hold MK in the palm of His hand. If you question MK, you are NOT questioning God. MK is a cult by all definitions. If you think we who post and comment on PT are demonic, you are wrong. You are believing the myth perpetuated by a group of women who would have you believe that a Cadillac is the new crucifix, that frontloading inventory is in someone’s best interest, that Mary Kay is the way to bring people to God.

If you question MK, you are using the God given ability to discern the truth from the lie. False Prophets vs. False Profits. My prayer is that you can figure this out for yourself much sooner, and less painfully than me. A special heart felt thanks to my friend PT who saved me from months of anguish. I am blessed.