Manipulating Women With Guest Events

In Mary Kay, there is a script for everything. If you invite someone to a success meeting or guest event, you better be ready to use a script. These events are held because they increase the recruiting odds dramatically. The NSDs want you to make the most of your opportunity to recruit, so they’ve got all sorts of guidelines for how to act and what to say.

Of course, this is all manipulative. It’s not just a matter of using common sales techniques. In Mary Kay, they take it to a whole new level by keying in on feelings of unhappiness (or even helping create or point out dissatisfaction).

Tips the nsds give for making a successful guest event (i.e. getting a recruit out of it):

  • Be sure to cover what to wear – professional dress (if she comes in jeans & we’re all looking good, she’ll feel out of place.) She is a Special Guest and you will have a Special Gift for her! (Your budget – $2.50 is good.) She can bring girlfriends; maybe one will join with her! Lure guests to an event by telling them you want them to purchase the 3 most expensive items they’ve ever wanted to buy, and offer those items at half-price.
  • Give your hottest names & phone numbers to your Director or DIQ so she can leave a fun message for your guest.
  • On the way in your car, make it fun! Snacks, some sweet & fun music (find a 50’s station!) Only talk about her (no Mary Kay) and don’t talk about yourself! Ask questions like, “What’s your job? “What activities are your children involved in?” and “What do you do for fun?”
  • When you arrive at the Guest Event, sit as close to the front as possible. Put your things down and mingle; do not sit until the program begins. This way she won’t be tired before we even begin. Mingling keeps her energized. Introduce her to as many people as you can – showcase her!
  • Be EXCITED; you should be clapping and cheering the loudest because your Guests are watching! They will be excited and sit on the edge of their chairs if YOU are! You should GO WILD! Stand up! When offered the opportunity to become a Consultant, LOOK at your Guest, because she’ll be looking at YOU!

Key phrases to use with your guest at the event:

  • You love the product! Sharing your enthusiasm for it will be easy for you!
  • Do you realize how much you’ve spent with me this last year – wholesale is always better than retail!
  • You owe it to yourself and your family to try!
  • There’s never been a better time at Mary Kay!
  • You have everything to gain and nothing to lose with the 90% buy-back guarantee!
  • What in the world would keep you from at least trying – we would have so much fun together!
  • I would love for us to team up together; I will help you – we can be the Dynamic Duo!
    And then close the deal. Fill out the agreement BEFORE you leave the event so you have it in writing! Don’t say “agreement” or “contract” because that’s scary. Instead, say:
  • It will take two seconds to fill out this sheet; I just need your birth date & SSN.
  • For the Starter Kit we can use MC, Visa, Discover or debit card.” (Check or Cash – ONLY if she doesn’t have a card)
  • You always need a reason to get the Starter Kit ordered. For example, say, “Great…we can get this emailed before midnight; you’ll have your kit for Easter. That’s perfect – you’ll be seeing your entire family then!” (Figure out the reason why she should get her kit NOW instead of later so you can tell her!)

If she didn’t say yes, but she didn’t say no, then she just needs layering and more info. Get her to watch a video from your director or other recruiting video. On the ride home, say:

  • Did you have fun?
  • Out of all you saw & heard, what impressed you the most?
  • Who did you relate to? (Director, DIQ, Red Jacket)
  • In your wildest dreams, if you ever did became a consultant, what would appeal to you?”
  • She will answer: extra $$$, flexibility, taxes, kids, fun, outlet, etc. Now you will know what her “Hot Button” is! Relate Mary Kay to her situation. If you’ve done your homework on the ride to the Guest Event, you’ ll know how Mary Kay can fit into her life!
  • Tell her to go home and do the Pillow Test: “If you think about MK, dream about it, and get up tomorrow still thinking about it – we need to talk!”
  • When you call to see how she slept, use the same phrases from yesterday: “What in the world do you have to lose?”

If she says NO WAY, that’s your worst case scenario, and you should give up. Try to get her to watch a video and ask the same questions on the way home.

  • But…. take the opportunity AWAY from her. Ask her to be a Talent Scout for you. Let her know that you have wonderful gifts for anyone who finds you your next team member.
  • If she mentions a name, say, “If so-and-so were to want to join, could that change your current interest level from where it is now to a 10 – which means you’re ready for your Starter Kit?”
  • Some will stay put, but watch out for the ones that light up! It’s fun to see them gleam and say “It sure would!” She’s recruitable! Get her to have a Class, an Update Makeover, or a Girl’s Night Out!

13 COMMENTS

  1. “Be EXCITED; you should be clapping and cheering the loudest because your Guests are watching! They will be excited and sit on the edge of their chairs if YOU are! You should GO WILD! Stand up! When offered the opportunity to become a Consultant, LOOK at your Guest, because she’ll be looking at YOU!”

    I feel second-hand embarrassment for these ladies. Maybe I am getting too old, but to see someone carrying on like this about beauty products would be a huge red flag for that relationship. Unless, of course, the whole point is to filter out those healthy women who don’t crave this type of fake energy. But still…cringe.

    But maybe that’s the point, right? Amway uses self-selecting filtering techniques (via tired old scripts) to rule out the “dream-stealers” before wasting any time on them. In most cases the Amway reps are not even aware that their scripts work this way. But they definitely push exclusivity and FOMO up front to quickly identify folks that will make an easier target. Screw the naysayers, right? This is a privileged club and you need to demonstrate that you are worthy of my time.

    Mary Kay’s approach is clearly not too different. If you are drawn to this type of fake energy, you will be easier to manipulate into buying way more product than you can ever hope to sell or use personally, and you can hopefully be counted on to summon that same energy for recruiting others.

    Cringe.

    15
  2. The first thing that popped out for me was having snacks ready in the car after taking your mark hostage (because basically that’s what it is – if they drove to the location on their own, they would have the freedom to leave whenever – of course there’s always Uber/Lyft). It might just be me, but as a rule I don’t like eating in the car whether I’m driving or a passenger.

    Also, I was a teen in the 1970s and I flashed on the Moonies and how they brainwashed people to join their cult.

    If someone asks me for my SSN for any reason other than collecting benefits, actual employment, financial services (loans/credit cards/bank accounts) that would be my cue to say YEAH NO.

    And calling the next morning to see how they slept? That sounds like a followup after a first date (and I have to say that I would be creeped out either way).

    Also, hounding on the person even after they emphatically decline “the opportunity” by making them watch a video, asking questions about people they know…

    “There’s never been a better time at Mary Kay” (just don’t mention the new online requirements, the Amazon storefront, and all the perks that have been discontinued by the company).

    I’m still wondering how consultants/directors are going to handle the Inventory Question (or handling it NOW) when MK will be fulfilling orders from their own inventory. Probably just lie, I suppose.

    12
    • All of this, and what Data Junkie said, too. So infantilizing.

      I don’t willingly put myself into situations I can’t escape easily. I also get carsick, so if I can’t drive I have to sit in the passenger seat up front and watch things going past. That naturally puts the kibosh on eating, besides that the average adult can handle a normal length car ride without needing a snack. I’m happy to hold a conversation, but I wasn’t into the SENIOR DAY ROAD TRIP!!!!! vibe in high school and sure as hell not now. Fake enthusiasm is draining and grating.

      If you want me on your side, treat me like an adult, not like a toddler who just went on the potty for the first time.

      11
  3. “It will take two seconds to fill out this sheet; I just need your birth date & SSN.”

    Oh hell to the no. No one gets my SSN but my employer or a healthcare provider.

    This is all just manipulation and harassment in a fancy package.

    13
  4. Another thing I’d hear was “make sure you’re recognized on stage because your guests will wonder why your name was never called!”

    Aka: yall order a ton of unnecessary product the month prior so I can pay my mortgage, and your reward is to have your name called so people who will last in MK for 3 months at best will be impressed with you.

    13
  5. Just reading that makes me want to crawl back into bed for a long nap. So much effort for such a little reward.

    11
  6. This is all so WEIRD and predatory. If the products and “opportunity” were really legit, this level of manipulation would not be necessary.

    The snacks and 50s music in the car? I’m out!!

    11
      • That and the “if she’s in jeans and we’re looking good [BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA]” shows that they’re completely out of touch with modern dress codes. Jeans are allowed by more and more workplaces, and a decent pair of jeans with a nice top and cute shoes makes a far more attractive and professional outfit than the short, tight, shiny, trashy clobber the K-bots consider “professional dress”.

        • I work from home now, but even when I worked in an office just a few years ago, my “uniform” was dark-wash jeans in a trouser or boot cut, nice top or blouse, sharp jacket, and kitten heels. For casual Friday, I would switch to flats and ditch the jacket, but it still looked sharp. So many of the photos I see on this site of MK women in what they imagine to be professional attire are laughable. They would never be mistaken for serious businesswomen. At best, they might be mistaken for administrative assistants, but not at a top-flight company. High-level professional women these days almost always wear pants–at least, in the fields I have worked in (software and pharma).

          • I dressed better and more professional working from home during Covid than the vast majority of these ladies. some just look dumpy, others look silly and some look trampy. Is that judgy? Yep, because you want me to think of you as a beauty expert.

          • You mean to tell me a MKBot lied on the internet? I mean they are always talking to ” a businessman”, “a stewardess”, “a waitress” or “the lady at the desk” who comment on how professional they look and how they can tell that they are Mary Kay Ladies!

            Interestingly, they never mention “businesswomen” or men in subordinate positions. It’s the “businessman” versus “mark” dichotomy. Equals versus opportunity.

  7. I was told to tell the guest she would be lad for her time with free MK. And don’t get me started when everyone was using the free trip vouchers maybe 20 years ago!

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