What Would Mary Kay Say
What do you think Mary Kay Ash say today about the company, Ryan’s leadership, the lawsuit against Richard, and the sinking ship?
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Stop dressing like clowns, streetwalkers, and mismatched frumps.
Stop with the dancing and waving stupid props while crossing the stage, walk like dignified ladies.
*takes trust funds away from descendants*
I think if MK were still around, she’d give the okay to wear pants (but only if they were pants you could buy from the company!)
She would be saying:
Cleta, you are not recruiting enough! Get those numbers up!
Directors, you need to be vigilant about granting access to your Facebook groups! That’s where Pink Truth gets a lot of their leaks!
Consultants, do NOT EVER post on social media about ANY difficulty you are having meeting goals or selling products! Recruits don’t need to know that!
Ryan, please ask for help!
Realistic version: If she were still alive, and competent, she’d never have given up control of the company to anyone. She never had any use for Richard when he was a child, and certainly not in his party-boy days. Certainly not a trust fund dilettante like Ryan. Also, I think she’d have realized that the MLM model is going the way of the dodo and shut things down well before now, probably in the way that would cause the most harm to the hoi polloi and conserve the most money for herself. And she’d make the family behave itself for the sake of appearances.
Popinki’s headcanon version: “Shuddup, crybaby, an’ get Grammy another double Macallen 30 Year Expression. S’not your money, s’mine. Hic! An’ don’ even think about tryna poison Grammy because all that makeup mummified me an’ I’m immora… immorma… marmorial now! Hic!”
Give Ryan an earful for his mismanagement. Wouldn’t have appointed him anyway. Be posting passive aggressive memes on Facebook and nagging directors on Snapchat to recruit, recruit, recruit baby! Put yourself into bankruptcy court to make me richer. What’s that, you are in debt? That’s a you problem sweetie and has nothing to do with an outdated pyramid scheme that went the way of the dodo in the 1980s. Put your big girl panties on and buy another $20,000 of inventory Shari! It’ll just fly off the shelf… (caveat: only if you live in Cali and have an obliging earthquake, own a cat or have a poltergeist infestation as that’s the only way it’ll fly off the shelf and frankly I doubt even the Amityville poltergeist would be seen dead in MK’s eyeshadows in boring colours with no pigmentation and a creasing problem that makes a paper jam in a printer look smooth).
I imagine MKA multiple surnames is probably pestering Beelzebub with free facials. He might actually use Timewise instead of brimstone seeing as it is more effective at causing chemical burns and the active ingredients seem to be battery acid. That’s just your skin detoxing hun xoxo (and not your face melting off like the Nazi in Indiana Jones).
“Boys, keep you dirty secrets secret! Like I had did with that other handful of husbands!”
Did. Not had did. Oy!