Written by Sad In Pink

Having been trained in the field of communication, I know how crucial it is to keep lines of communication open when working a business. Even in relationships, this is a key ingredient to success. So why would any company allow its leaders to avoid discussing problems openly?

There is an old saying that goes “you are either part of the problem or part of the solution”. Many of the leaders in Mary Kay are more of a problem than a solution because they are unwilling to openly discuss issues that could lead to solutions or at least reality.

For the most part, we are taught to avoid any negative talk. Even a discussion of reality such as low commission checks (for directors) or the difficulty of booking classes (for consultants) is looked at as negative communication. Heaven forbid that we address these concerns! Talking about reality is akin to drinking poison in the minds of the 2% club. So they begin at an early stage to indoctrinate consultants to avoid saying things like: “My classes all cancelled this week.” Or “No one wants to have a class”. On the director level… talk such as “My commission check has been low over the last few months. I cannot keep living like this.” Or “I have had to make co-pays on the car the last six months and I cannot keep it up.” All of this is considered forbidden communication.

I remember several times during my directorship I was told to avoid certain other directors because they had a bad “attitude.” I was supposed to look upline to those who had achieved more if I needed advice, and I was never to tell any unit members if I faced any struggles. In fact, all of Mary Kay seemed to be shrouded in mystery. You only learned about certain things on a need to know basis.

Potential recruits are not told about inventory packages until “after” they sign up. DIQ is surrounded by silence too. It is not until you are in the frenzy to make it month by month that you know the truth of how hard it is to reach your goal of thirty recruits…all active at the same time and a production level of $16,000. It sounds so easy and everyone is so positive that you will have an easy time of it reaching director. If we had known how stressful, intense, and sometimes disappointing this can be, many of us would never have entered or attempted to complete this.

Once you become a director, you think you can relax… but it is more of the same as you are pushed on and on to the next higher goal. There is no rest, but no one bothered to tell you that. So, you keep on rushing ahead for the ever elusive pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. The truth is there never is an end to the rainbow. The run is for the rest of your stay in Mary Kay.

Do you wonder why I found this website so comforting? It was because I had few if any other directors I could talk to. No one wanted to admit that we were like a dog chasing our tails in never ending circles only to find we could never rest. Whether you are a consultant or a director, most of us just want someone to be honest with us. However, it is rare to get an honest answer from anyone in the Pink Fog.

Faking it till you make does not work. Pretending we are a success when we are not is called “fantasy”. Most of us want to live in the real world with real solutions to our problems. There is nothing wrong with a positive mental attitude so long as it is grounded upon facts. Communication helps us to find solid answers…this is what most of us were lacking in our MK experience… the TRUTH!

Now at this website… we are finding that the truth is setting us free!


  1. Disguising the underlying reality in MLM is absolutely required to perpetuate the lies of MLM. If new recruits understood the following, would they sign up?
    – The reps, not outside customers, are the money source in MLM
    – Nearly all product purchases in MLM are made by the sales force, not outside customers
    – Product pricing includes loads of bonuses to layers upon layers of uninvolved upline reps, pushing the prices so high no one will buy the products
    – The real risks of real damage to their own reputation and their relationships from MLM involvent
    – Pity purchases are not sustainable, and no one buys overpriced MLM products from strangers
    – Mary Kay Corp sees sales reps as customers, not business owners
    – Inventory is slowly piling up of in the homes of active sales reps
    – Over 99% of reps lose money, no matter how hard they work
    – All but the very top directors make less than minimum wage for their hours worked
    – Spa Days and Facials are a turn-off to friends and family once they realize these are nothing more than sales meetings
    – Most people know better than to mix money and friendships
    – All the incentives in Mary Kay are tied to orders.. There are no incentives tied to selling. May Kay does not care if you ever sell a thing, so long as you keep ordering

    These are some of the many reasons why MLMers can’t be truthful.

  2. I can really relate to what you wrote. Thank you for sharing. I totally remember the craziness of DIQ and really didn’t understand it. I’m so glad now that when I became a director, we had online classes due to covid and I didn’t have to go to Dallas!! I lasted and struggled as a director for 1 year. I accumulated a lot of inventory and debt. I was ashamed that I had inadvertently mislead my team. There are so many regrets. I really had no idea that I could lose everything if my team didn’t make production. That was eye opening. I too was warned away from certain directors because of one reason or another. I watched director friends with teams smaller than mine, get court of sales every year. I know she was purchasing her own directorship! I finally got tired of the deception, refused to take the car and decided to “step down” as a director. Ironic that that is what they call it when they are the ones pushing you out. I never thought that my Sr. Director and national would both be in a panic as to what to tell my team. That hit me in a strange way. Even though I didn’t want to be a director, I didn’t want to cost my director any people. I figured that I would hand them over and go about my business. I was wrong. Those two were panicked that I would start a landslide. That’s when I decided to not continue helping. It was not a very good experience. BTW, that director that I had become friends with didn’t contact me much anymore. I’m sure she was warned off of me due to my negative attitude.

  3. Well said! I use to be a director and I stepped down too. I can relate to everything you said. Also, no one calls me anymore since I am no longer a director.


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