Husbands Should Stand Up to Mary Kay

The Mary Kaybots will say you’re unsupportive. They’ll tell your wife that you’re just “trying to hold her back,” or that you “don’t want her to have something just for herself.” You’ll be called negative. They’ll say you just don’t “get it.”

The real truth is that you understand all too well what a losing proposition Mary Kay Cosmetics is. The failure rate in this so-called business is astronomically higher than any legitimate business. Why? Because it’s more of a pyramid scheme (in which only a very small few win, dependent, of course, on all the rest to pass their money up the chain). It’s not a real business in which results are reasonably correlated to your efforts.

So Mary Kay representatives must demonize those who use logic and reason to debunk this flopportunity. The Mary Kay director wants your wife to “invest” thousands of dollars in inventory, and you suggest she start with a very small order until she sees what she’s selling. “Unsupportive! You need inventory to be successful! He must want you to fail!”

The husband recognizes that the family’s money is going down the black hole called Mary Kay for repetitive “training” events which are nothing more than recruiting events. Between supplies, gas, postage, and a myriad of other expenses, the husband sees that after months, this “business” isn’t even close to showing a profit. What happened to that “50% profit” they all bragged about? The ability to start earning money right away? The husband sees Mary Kay for what it is and questions the bottom line. “He doesn’t get it! It takes time for a business to make money! You have to work the numbers! He must not want you to succeed!” 

Mr. Right finds out that his wife is placing an order for a bunch of new products, even though he sees that large initial inventory order still sitting in the same place… collecting dust. Of course, the story is that she needs the newest stuff, that it will fly right off the shelf, that this product is totally different and will jump-start her business. (Or maybe even worse, she may tell him that she’s “finishing star” which is a big deal in MK and something she can’t miss out on!) The husband wisely suggests that she use a few catalogs to gauge interest in the products before ordering them and adding to the credit card bill and dust collectors. “You don’t need his permission to run your business the way you see fit! By the time you get around to ordering, the good stuff will be sold out! He doesn’t understand what women want!”

And so this story plays itself out  in households around the country. Husbands seem to be in a no-win. If they see the signs (and most do, very quickly) and they don’t do anything, they’re headed down the road of financial ruin. If they do say something, they’re demonized by the Kaybots because that’s the only effective way to get women to NOT listen to the logic and reason presented by the husbands.

But husbands, you need to stand firm. Stop the Mary Kay train as fast as you can, before it ruins your marriage. Here is one reader’s story:

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I admit to being a little bitter when composing this but I have good reason to be. I recently filed for and completed my divorce with a 10 year Mary kay director. During our marriage I made many sacrifices believing in the Mary Kay myth that she so well propagated. I turned down jobs and promotions to raise our child to give her the 60-70 hrs per week she needed to work. I destroyed my credit so she could drive a free pink cadillac that ended up costing us $600+ per month. I at one point even joined her unit and bought inventory so she could make recruiting quotas during her DIQ. That was just the tip of the MK iceberg.

The real colors were shown however during the divorce. This self proclaimed Independent woman with a “career” that she said allowed her to work at home, make good money, and be available to raise a child is now a proven  myth and warning to all who read this.

This Independent woman cannot function alone and has moved her mom into the house I gave her. (31 + yrs old and living with mommy) real independent (I wonder if this pitch is used to recruit). She often stated to her new recruits “a man is not a plan”. Though I only worked part time she still depends on me for monthly support. according to her, she cannot afford clothes for a toddler, her father pays her healthcare, both water and electric have been turned off several times at the house, and there is no cable TV anymore.

Yet despite all this on review of her credit card bills (which she actually expects me to pay) She is charging Limousine rides, Hotels at career conference (held only about 15 miles from the house), $700 Mary Kay dinners, prizes for lazy consultants, $350 a month for a meeting hall, and it goes on and on. So much for “once I become a director I will start making money”.

True gross incomes in MK can look nice when they show you their check in a meeting. What they are not telling you is how expensive it is to run that kind of “business”. By the time you add it all up I was making more working 25hrs a week retail than my wife was as a 10 year director working 60 hours a week and destroying a family while doing so.

This story is repeated all across the world everyday I’m sure, However even in her own unit her top two people have separated from or divorced their husbands recently as well. In the last year I have grown dramatically and forgive her for everything and wish her well.

Though Mary Kay wasn’t our only problem it made the little ones bigger than they ever would have been. I just hope this letter finds the right people and they get out of this scam before it is too late for them as well. Maybe had I been more pro active I may have been able to save my family.

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Husbands, stand up to Mary Kay. Help guide your wife’s decisions regarding Mary Kay, because her decisions are clouded by the pink fog, emotional manipulation by her upline, and nonsensical logic as to why she should order more. the best way you can support her is by standing up for your family and your finances.

21 COMMENTS

  1. The ex of one NSD was bad-mouthing Mary Kay. He was being threatened to be sued by Mary Kay corporation.

    Can they, really?

    He divorced the NSD because she was never home, always busy with working the business, among other things.

    11
    • Theoretically, you can sue anyone for anything you want, though whether it will stand up in court is the big question. Knowing how MK operates, it wouldn’t surprise me to learn they were threatening to sue him for defamation or something just to shut him up. Even if he was innocent or the case was thrown out, most individuals don’t have the time and money to spend on a pointless legal battle, especially against a large corporation with its own dedicated legal team. And if he was found guilty, the reparations would cost him everything he has.

      There are species of sharks that give birth to live pups… specifically one live pup, because the survivor ate all its siblings in utero. There’s a reason why unscrupulous lawyers are compared to sharks.

      14
      • Thank you, Popinki.
        This NSD, was so convincing that she turned everyone against her ex even though it’s been made clear what she did is exploitative.
        I am really so intrigued and repulsed at how she effectively manipulates people around her.

        Yes, I agree about the lawyers.
        There are the enablers too who make this manipulation possible.

        9
        1
      • Both Melaleuca and Young Living threatened to sue Hannah Alonso over her claims on YouTube; Melaleuca over her video showing two women trying to get Hannah to advertise for them and Young Living over her leaking an e-mail discussing a turn to affiliate marketing in the near future.

        Fitness scammer turned Christian grifter Brittany Dawn claimed her lawyers “were pumped up” over the prospect of suing individual redditors over their posts on the Brittany Dawn sub-Reddit while The American Family RoadTrip (aka the Lott Family) successfully got Reddit to remove posts about them from the Fundie Snark Uncensored* sub by threatening legal action.

        * The irony is very bitter in retrospect.

        11
  2. This husband’s story is right on the mark. But some MaryKay-ers will never come out of fantasy land (like the ones who wrote in on Fridays here.). It’s that old saying, “Don’t confuse me with the facts!”

    12
  3. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. I did make money in Mary Kay. I was really good at sales and decent at recruiting.

    But I never made enough money to run both my business and my household–it was always one or the other. Either I pay cash for groceries and put product reorders on a credit card, or I pay cash for Seminar and put the kids’ clothes on a credit card. Always sure that next month, I’d turn the corner in my business and be able to pay it all off.

    I knew exactly how many days it took for my personal bank to process “paychecks” from the bank where I had my business account. It was a constant shuffle of writing myself lukewarm paychecks and hustling to sell something so there was enough money in my business account to cover it, hoping that the banks hadn’t gotten more efficient at transferring the money.

    It was exhausting. And it was expensive. It was far from the peace and abundance that Mary Kay promises during recruiting speeches. And it was far more the norm than the exception. If anything, I was selling more and had more money to shuffle than most do.

    14
    1
  4. Financial discipline should be taught in school. Just look at the number of middle-class Americans making good money but carrying significant debt, who, when they retire, will take a significant lifestyle hit in retirement.

    Husbands as breadwinners are more likely to see the dangers of borrowing to invest. It would certainly be easier to put limits on borrowing if more people understood the value of saving, not borrowing, to invest.

    Before I met my wife, I had already sworn off credit card debt. I still used credit cards for convenience, but if I could not afford to pay in full for something, I waited until I could before purchasing. I never carried a balance on credit cards.

    My marriage started out with only mortgage debt. My wife was intrigued and to her credit wanted to continue this philosophy, and eagerly shared my passion for avoiding debt. No borrowing. We lived below our means all the way to retirement.

    I feel for men who have to fight this battle every month with their wives. We want our special lady to be happy. But saving, instead of borrowing, for any indulgence sets your finances up for success. And every gift she receives, knowing you saved for it, has so much greater meaning.

    And everything you purchase together costs much less when you don’t finance it with a credit card. Once living with this mindset, MLM participation makes absolutely no sense. It becomes obvious when you are asked to throw good money after bad. The idea of saving up from your MLM proceeds before purchasing more inventory quickly exposes the folly, and it all comes to a screeching halt by default.

    Don’t ever borrow to invest. Save to invest. And steer clear of MLM!

    15
  5. “both water and electric have been turned off several times at the house”

    Sue for full custody of the child. A house without utilities is unsafe living conditions and child neglect.

    15
  6. MK told us to work like heck when the babies were younger because they wouldn’t remember when we were gone. Now, looking back, I remember not being with them as much as I could have when they were tiny. I’m sure it affected them too somehow. Heartbreaking.

    13
    1
    • Look at ridiculous Taylor McKnight checking herself into a hotel yesterday so she could be alone and focus on begging for help to get the “free Cadillac”. No telling how much debt she and her team (that don’t have use of the car!) created using credit cards. Good luck when she has to make the copays and cover the ridiculously high insurance.

      Her child doesn’t give a flip about a pink car- the years go by so quickly and she is a fool to make MK her priority.

      12
  7. True story! Two days before the end of June (seminar sharks out in the water), a lady pulled in to our driveway. She had seen my husband outside and saw a Mary Kay decal on my car that no longer runs and was down at the bottom of my driveway. She started asking him about if I still sold it. I had been a former car “earning” director back in 2020. He said no, I was out of that mess. She proceeded to want to talk to me about signing back up. He asked her to drive off. It took him actually getting quite rude to get her to leave. I am sooooo thankful to be out of MaryKay. Hubby supported me but I never really showed much profit. It all went back into my “business” or to unit expenses (which i was never aware of before being hustled to become a director). I lost @$10,000 in the MK sham and was promised that if I ever got back into it, I would be divorced. My advice to the spouses or partners is to ask for accountability. The numbers don’t lie.

    17
    • How desperate is someone if they pull over & want to talk to you about joining, just by seeing a Mary Kay decal on a stranger’s car?!
      How embarrassing for her!
      And we’re supposed to believe sales that products “fly off the shelves and sell themselves”?

  8. This isn’t a small business, it’s an addiction. The women are hooked on the high of a sisterhood (based on greed) and go to meetings and conventions to get their fix. The only ones making money are the upper level drug dealers (the top nationals) and the drug manufacturers (MK Corporate).

    Partners, you have to treat this like an addiction and lock down your finances and protect yourself against the behavior of the addict.

    12
  9. Ladies! Please get a grip! Just note how many NSD’s have hypened last names due to divorce and note how many times each NSD has been married. Buy a clue from Alex….please!

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