A Frustrated Mary Kay Husband
Another Mary Kay husband writes to tell us of the deception, manipulation, and financial impact of his wife’s decision to get involved with the company.
I’ve read through the pink truth website off and on for over a year now but I thought I would toss you an e-mail since I really don’t have anyone else to talk to about “this”.
Two Novembers ago, my wife said that she was interested in joining Mary Kay after she had a couple facials done by someone she knew. Prior to that, we had talked about the fact that Mary Kay is probably a pyramid scheme (in which we both agreed) and I never thought in a million years that she would express ANY interest in it.
I figured, since signing up with a starter kit didn’t really cost that much ($100) and we had recently moved about 3 hours away from our hometown (because of my job), and she was staying home and taking care of our young boys, I thought it would probably wouldn’t be “that bad” for her to get out and do something. I told her I thought it was probably a scam but if she felt comfortable with it, then do it.
Now, I love my wife, but her next move was inconceivably “bad” in my opinion. She tells me a few days later that she purchased $2,700 in inventory. To be honest, I flipped my lid at that point. We are pretty frugal to begin with and she told me after she made the purchase.
Needless to say this has caused a lot of strain on our marriage for the past two years. Since then, I’ve done my research on MLMs. There is so much information out there on YouTube. I totally feel like she was a victim (but she doesn’t see it that way). She truly believes that if it doesn’t sell, it’s her fault and she didn’t follow the system.
It’s been more than two years and the initial credit card purchase of MK inventory has only been paid down only about $500. It seems that the only way that you can really make money is to recruit. Just selling this stuff doesn’t yield a return that is worth it. She managed to get one recruit but that is it.
It’s gotten so bad that I’m not even allow to ask any specific questions about it or she gets SO upset with me immediately. I always argued who gets left holding the bag when it doesn’t sell but she really thinks I just want to make her miserable which is simply not true at all. I want her to be happy and NOT be taken advantage of (and honestly I don’t think she feels like she’s been taken advantage of).
She has completely swallowed the Mary Kay kool-aid and there is no point for me to try to convince her to send the inventory back before the year is up because it will just end up in an argument. I really do feel horrible for making her feel so bad about it but she continues to think it’s such a great thing and I have yet to see anything great about it.
Anymore, I just bit my lip and dread the day that I have to start draining our family finances to pay for something that could have (should have) been avoided to begin with. There are plenty of volunteer jobs out there where you DON’T lose money :).
Anyway, I’m not writing you to ask you to talk to my wife or anything like that. I just thought I could talk with someone that could possibly understand how I feel. Maybe all I need is someone to tell me it’s not that bad and I shouldn’t worry about it because it’s not worth it. Humongous ***SIGH***
Visit the
It’s completely a big deal and worth worrying about 😟
Unfortunately she’s not going to budge until she decides for herself. She’s deep in the fog where she’s been led to believe that MK=good and anyone against it is just hating.
Please do take steps to protect your finances. Keep a close eye on any joint accounts and credit cards. Monitor your credit, and that of any minor children you have. You might even want to freeze it (and children’s) so she can’t open charge accounts or loans in your names. It might seem extreme but she’s not thinking the way she normally would right now.
Fingers crossed that she’ll come out of the fog soon.
“…she’s not thinking like she normally would right now.”
So true.
If she continues to get you deeper in debt, then I would worry. So many marriages fail due to financial problems and we wouldn’t want that to happen to you and your wife. Unfortunately she has succumbed to the brainwashing, cult like culture in Mary Kay. I was in Mary Kay for 12 years and my husband finally agreed to attend Seminar with me. That is when he opened my eyes to the cult I was part of. We discussed it over dinner after the opening general session and I quit the very next day. I left my red jacket on the hotel bed. As soon as we got home I googled how to return inventory and that is when I found Pink Truth. Good luck to you, I hope you can get through to your wife.
OP, if were in your shoes, I’d do this…
Set a limit on how much she’s allowed to “spend” on this. Then coach her on setting up a comprehensive ledger. Review it monthly.
If you do this right, it will become obvious to her over time that this is a money pit. You won’t need to point it out…let the ledger do the talking.
But you cannot, under any circumstances, increase the amount she is allowed to lose. The business must pay for itself after that initial investment. If the business runs out of money, that’s the end of it.
These stories make me so angry. These young moms are just looking for purpose, only to get snared by these MLM vultures. And the carnage doesn’t stop with finances. Relationships are the most precious thing to be impacted, and the hardest to restore…especially marriage!
“Dread the day that I have to start draining our family finances to pay for something that could have (should have) been avoided to begin with.”
It’s already draining … she drained out $2700 immediately and hasn’t paid it back.
How much interest on that initial purchase has been drained from your family income?
How much fast food has been bought because she’s gone to a training evening and wasn’t there to cook?
Dear hubby–why are you putting up with that? Your wife is showing no respect for you.
Does your wife read this site? Every monday-thursday there are letters from people that write in that can’t make the system work.
Point this out to your wife: MK is based on a 1960 way of selling. There aren’t enough women in the world to sell MK , or recruit. Many of her directors bought their way into the system. They are either nepo babies, or married someone that is LOADED.
If you don’t want to hear it from us, put a call into DR LAURA (800-375-2872). She’ll set you straight.
BTW- I’m not kidding.
If he wants to consult a marriage counselor, he should go to a REAL therapist with the proper degrees and experience, not that “Dr.” Laura fraud.
I hear your pain, I put my husband through that too. I had chugged the kool-aid and all I saw was pink. My MIL (mother in-law) was the one that recruited me. However, after a bit of time.. my husband told me that if anything was business related- the business had to pay for it. Meaning food, gas, whatever… if I was “doing business”, the business had to pay for it. I also was limited to 1 business credit card. But even with all of that… I still racked up $22K in credit card debt by the time I had decided to quit. My husband had no idea it was that high. I was so ashamed. It was the hardest thing for me to confess this to him- he’s a good man, and didn’t deserve that level of stress. I took it upon myself to pay that off- by myself… it took about 7 yrs.
Put safeguards on your credit and your children’s credit. Seriously, those thoughts crossed my mind when I was scrambling to get to the “next level”… whatever level that was. Be firm with her… not a penny of household money goes to this. And she should be contributing TO your household income… I started out with $100 a month. All of this started to wake me up to this cultish business.
I wish you luck!