Watching Seminar From a Distance
Written by SuzyQ
I am 19 years out of Mary Kay and I still read and contribute Pink Truth. Pink Truth saved my life as I publicly imploded as a director on the site in 2007.
I am watching the changes to Seminar and it is heart-wrenching. The things that matter haven’t changed… being honest about the fact that MK is a MLM and 90+% of people will lose money, etc. But the usual fanfare of Seminar and the recognition of accomplishments has changed.
The royalty reception used to always include the “fancy” mashed potatoes in a champagne glass and lots of fancy appetizers. (With tall tables and no chairs and nowhere to put your purse.) Jowdy used to do the photography and we were able to view all the photos they took and buy the ones we wanted. (I remember I had at least 3 to choose from for my stage walk.) We could review all the photos from all the seminars and see other women we knew, or women we wanted to emulate.
We either earned lunches or we ate in the cattle call lunchroom. The earned lunches were passable, but always included chicken. If we ate in the cattle call lunchroom it was not uncommon to buy $6 hotdogs and $4 water from the vendors. (That was a lot in 2000!)
There were so many added expenses for Seminar. One year our wanna-be-area had a banquet at the hotel we were staying in. (at our national’s request) We served salad. I mean that is all we served. Salad. That was all we could afford to pay for. As a special touch, we had a horse’s head at the serving table reminiscent of “The Godfather” scene, we had a denim and diamonds theme, and somehow the hotel thought this was an appropriate decoration. The “dinner” was at least $35 for consultants.
When I was attending Seminars, the goal was to have the most ribbons attached to your name tag as possible. The longer the string of ribbons, the better you were. I remember seeing Lisa Allison at a seminar. We debuted as millennium (1999) directors together and she was at my DIQ training. At seminar in 2000, she said she was some super dooper director and had just broken a nail and she was very upset… I didn’t know how to respond and left the room.
I would really like to bring this post to a logical conclusion, but I think about nsd Mary Kay Raynor calling me a “baby Christian” (and retired after 5 years) and Marlys Skillings (former nsd) sent me birthday cards for a least 5 years after I quit, wishing me my best MK year ever, and Amie Gamboian (former nsd) who got honest for once in her life and “retired” after 5 years because the hamster wheel went on and on. And Stacy James who I idolized and until she moved to Oklahoma was local so I attended her events.
And my BFFs forever who are still in Mary Kay, pursuing this stupid goal, and probably going to Seminar this year for the 10th, 20th maybe 30th time. Wasting time, money and self-respect for a dream that will never happen. Ever.
Some things never change. But I’m so happy I got out when I did.
Visit the
I just don’t understand how people who have been in for a long time don’t see how things are getting worse, and not get out themselves. 🤷🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️🤪
So after spending all of June maxing out credit cards and begging for sales to finish the year, consultants now get to scramble to fund every aspect of this miserable, useless convention. Returning home exhausted to more debt and the requirement to start the whole process over sounds miserable.
Pink- it is miserable. The sleep deprivation, the crappy food with practically zero nutritional value and living on caffeine for 5 days- it’s miserable. Add in top of it, the constant need to look your best, act your best, and portray that you are living your very best life, it’s miserable. Deep down you know you are lying. Deep down you are comparing yourself and all the flaws to someone else’s perceived best. You always come up on the short end of the stick. So each time you go, your self esteem takes a hit. Seminar is the cult stimulation that brings a person to all sorts of emotional highs and lows. You are so exhausted by the end, that you’re in tears over everything… you’ve lost all critical thinking by this point. The emotional manipulation is rampant and all those who participate are subjected to it at some level or another.
Looking back, I see clearly now what I was manipulated into and whole heartedly participated in for years. It sickens me. I long for the demise of this wretched company and all it stands for.
Thank you for sharing SuzyQ. Reading these first-hand accounts always amazes me. Having traveled myself for business on and off for decades, how can these ladies think Seminar is anything close to “normal” business travel?
The closest analogy for me would be association gatherings such as Comic Con, auto/boat shows, Consumer Electonics Show or other elective/hobby groups. What does that say about the seriousness of MK as a business?
My guess is Comic Con attendees have a far more satisfying experience than Seminar attendees. They get to stay where they want, see what they want, eat what they want, and interact with people who share their passion but expect nothing from them.
Face it. Mary Kay participation is a very expensive hobby masquerading as a business opportunity. Ladies, try out a Comic Con or Consumer Electronics Show to see what you are missing out on! No one will recruit you or judge you for how you dress!
(And for kicks, watch the movie “Paul” starring Seth Rogan and Simon Pegg to get a glimpse of these passions in the extreme)
I went to the Consumer’s Electronics Show and my company PAID ALL THE EXPENSES!
ComiCon or any other con … you pay your own way and do your own thing.
OMG, so spot-on Suz! My first Seminar, I was a DIQ and utterly lost in the pink fog. I walked the stage, picked up my first Queen’s Court ring and thought that this company was the best thing for women EVER. All the glitz and glam, the Friends of Time performances, the sneak peeks of new products, the sugar-sharp directors and NSDs who I wanted to emulate. It was a peak experience for me.
Fast forward to my last seminar as a director. It was exhausting, financially draining and just more of the same-old, same-old. I truly believed that I had to project the Mary Kay enthusiasm to my unit and be the “speed of the leader.” But it all felt so pointless. I felt bad for my consultants who spent a muck ton of money to be there just to see the same dog-and-pony show with no useful information to take home with them.
I cannot possibly imagine myself trying to convince anyone to attend Seminar this year while it’s painfully obvious that Mary Kay as we all knew it is circling the drain. When MK goes affiliate – or whatever it’s going to do – it will be devastating to so many.
My ex loved the Consumer Electronics Show and we probably went every year for 15 years, at least. I had (and have) very little interest in computers BUT the Consumer Electronics Show still had a LOT more interesting stuff going on (that I enjoyed) than any MaryKay seminar.
Take a look at all that has changed since I wrote this! It gets worse, much worse. I am with you PP, my first seminar I was a consultant. By my second one I was a director. So wrapped up in everything MK. Makes me sick to think about it . All of these years later PP, I’ll bet we could still recruit someone- we were that good. I am so so SO glad this is coming to the inevitable, messy end. Thank you Tracy, and all of you writers and readers, for your relentless pursuit of the truth!
I’ve been to a handful of Seminars at different stages of my Mary Kay journey, and I always left feeling the same way: searching for the one thing I was missing. I was convinced there had to be some secret everyone else knew that I didn’t.
Looking back, my first red flag should have been when my director and National made me feel guilty for missing Seminar because I was on strict bed rest with my first child. Somehow, even following my doctor’s orders made me feel like I wasn’t committed enough.
Every Seminar ended the same way. I’d come home full of dreams and motivation, only to eventually conclude that I must be doing something wrong. After all, I’d listened to the speeches, learned from “the best,” and heard over and over how these women had busier lives than I did while somehow selling more, recruiting more, and earning more. Obviously, the problem had to be me…or so I believed.
The last Seminar I attended was different. I hadn’t earned anything, so I felt like I was already on the outside looking in. I went through the Expo, visited every booth, and talked to anyone from Corporate who would give me a few minutes. I was genuinely looking for something practical—some nugget of information that would explain what I was missing.
By the time the Expo closed, I realized I’d learned absolutely nothing. That was a turning point.
By the end of Seminar, I was sitting by the pool instead of rushing to the next event. I found myself laughing at everything that had once seemed so important. The illusion was starting to crack, and for the first time, I wasn’t looking for the missing secret anymore. I was realizing there wasn’t one.
One memorable seminar, my director couldn’t come. So I got to hang out with her senior, who was the daughter of a national, a million dollar director, and trying her dangdest to get to national herself. She rented a limo to take us to “unit awards” which were held at her house on the outskirts of Dallas. The a/c was broken. So there we were, 18 or so women already sweaty from a day’s walking around the Dallas July, in evening wear, crammed into a limo that was roughly the same temperature as outside. With no refreshments in the refreshment carts, not even water–I assume because that would have been an extra charge. It was supposed to be the epitome of glamour, like all things seminar related. But it just fell completely flat. Pretension with none of the luxury.
That whole night was a horror show worthy of its own article. I felt so so so so so small by the end of it.
Frosty, have you written about the “horror show” before? If so, please share a link. If not, please share the story!
I thought I had, but I can’t find it anywhere. Let’s see if I can drag it out this week. Just when I thought there were no sore spots left in my soul for this sham of a business!
I’m spoiled by Costco Food Court so to me, $6 for a hot dog and $4 for a water is STILL a lot of money.
Aw, shoot. Now I have a craving for a Costco hot dog, and since we have only one car, I have no way to go get one!
I was watching some footage from the late 70’s and early 80’s and it was a whole different affair.
Chorus line kick lines, men in tuxes ushering the women around, women given fur coats (not a fan of real fur, but anyway) and the keys to their new cars were given to them on stage. The women overall were dressed much more nicely and they looked polished. It was cheesy but they tried to make it swanky.
Now it’s just a bunch of… whoever sloppily dressed and prancing across the stage in silly wigs and inflatable flamingos. No one is even trying anymore.